Being a celebrity such as a famous film star or sports personality brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?

#celebrity #film #star #sports #personality

Most of the people prefer extremely hard and dangerous sports

such

as sky diving and skiing jump, because when they experience it, their feeling

are

Suggestion

dramatically higher than other things. Due to danger issues, some people say that those things should be banned.

This

essay will discuss that these things should completely exist for relaxation and leisure time. The dangers of extreme outdoor activities are quietly serious to

human body

Suggestion

the human body

. It can change people's lives and if it is really serious, people can die.

For instance

, when a person

Suggestion

does

sky diving, if he did not check his suit and parachute, he can get heart attack and his important body part will break. So, those are hazardous to human.

On the other hand

, the breath taking activities give huge pleasure to us and we can reduce our stress from society with it. Because it is one challenge to mankind's limit. So, if we experience it, the amount of pleasure is extremely huge.

For example

, in skiing, when the jumper is ready to start and succeed to flip it, he can feel pleasant and get back all of his effort. These are the reasons why people do these things, even though these are hazardous and it can kill them.

This

essay argued that breath taking activities

have

Suggestion

has

to exist in our life for relaxation and spending our leisure time. In my view, there is no reason to ban these things,

furthermore

, spend your time wisely.

Mon Feb 03 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

244 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Public scrutiny
Intrusive
Endorsements
Sponsorships
Financial security
High-profile collaborations
Social influence
Philanthropic efforts
Trust issues
Mental health challenges
Substance abuse
Pressures of celebrity
Expectations
Disconnect from reality
Normalcy

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Being a celebrity such as a famous film star or sports personality brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Young people spend too much of their free time in shopping malls. This has a negative effect on young people and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Using computers and mobile phones in communication -> negative impact on reading and writing among young people, agree or disagree.

Many people think that to become a successful specialist it's better to choose a career early in life and never changer it later. To what extent do you agree with tis view. support your opinion with relevant examples.

Employers should give their staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to help employees get better at their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?