IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In your opinion, is it important to learn English? Should we try ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#english #languages
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
English
Use synonyms
 is the universal
language
Use synonyms
 encouraged by almost all the
countries
Use synonyms
 in the world. To make
communication
Use synonyms
 easier between all the
countries
Use synonyms
,
English
Use synonyms
 is chosen as
only
Correct article usage
the only
show examples
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
language
Use synonyms
 in all the
non
Add a hyphen
non-English
show examples
English
Use synonyms
 speaking
countries
Use synonyms
 to implement it in Academics itself as teaching and learning
language
Use synonyms
 which will be easier
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 students to learn the
language
Use synonyms
 from childhood.
However
Linking Words
, citizens criticize for not giving priority to
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
 local
languages
Use synonyms
 in their respective areas.
This
Linking Words
 Essay briefs the issue in detail.
To begin
Linking Words
,
From
Change preposition
In
show examples
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
 century all the
countries
Use synonyms
 in the world has changed and globalized in
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 trade and commerce,
relationship
Correct article usage
the relationship
show examples
 between
countries
Use synonyms
 has increased
due to
Linking Words
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
show examples
 in technology,
trade
Correct word choice
and trade
show examples
 between
countries
Use synonyms
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
also
Linking Words
 improved, In
this
Linking Words
 developing world Education and business
also
Linking Words
 started exchanging in all the
countries
Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
 leads to
communication
Use synonyms
 problem to
people
Use synonyms
, keeping
this
Linking Words
 in mind since most the
countries
Use synonyms
 speak
English
Use synonyms
 and it is the easiest
language
Use synonyms
 to learn, All the
countries
Use synonyms
 started learning
English
Use synonyms
 and preferred as a universal
language
Use synonyms
, well
this
Linking Words
 is benefitted to everyone but the local
languages
Use synonyms
 in the country has been neglected because everyone prefer to speak in
English
Use synonyms
 it was more comfortable to communicate with other
language
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
.
Continuing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
, All
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
languages
Use synonyms
 should be given importance to learn
instead
Linking Words
 of stopping
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
completely,
English
Use synonyms
 is the universal
language
Use synonyms
 for
communication
Use synonyms
 at the same time the local
language
Use synonyms
 should
also
Linking Words
 be the priority for Local citizens,
For example
Linking Words
, In
my
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
view I have seen
people
Use synonyms
 speaking many
languages
Use synonyms
 in different state in India, India is the land of many mixed
languages
Use synonyms
 and different cultures
people
Use synonyms
 speak different
languages
Use synonyms
 it is difficult to communicate with other linguistic
people
Use synonyms
, because of
this
Linking Words
 government has decided to overcome
this
Linking Words
 problem and they passed a new rule that,
English
Use synonyms
 has to be thought has a first
language
Use synonyms
 in Institution and the second
language
Use synonyms
 should be most speaking
language
Use synonyms
 in their region of their choice by the state to respect the local
language
Use synonyms
. In
summarize
Replace the word
summary
show examples
,
English
Use synonyms
 should to given preference in all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
to learn
Verb problem
apply
show examples
for easier
communication
Use synonyms
 between
people
Use synonyms
 in different
countries
Use synonyms
, At the same time their local
language
Use synonyms
 should
also
Linking Words
 be given the same priority as of Indian government to respect their
language
Use synonyms
 and culture.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Task Response: The essay partially addresses the prompt by discussing the importance of learning English and the need to ensure the survival of local languages. However, the essay lacks depth in addressing the reasons for and against learning English and preserving local languages. The response could be more balanced and provide a more comprehensive analysis of both aspects.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a logical structure and presents some supporting points effectively. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more clearly presented to frame the discussion and the main points could be more effectively connected throughout the essay to improve coherence and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: