The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of sunshine hours per year in three major city Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of sunshine hours per year in three major city

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
This
chart and table display the average
temperature
in twelve months and annual sunshine
hours
in 3 different cities respectively which are
London
, New
York
, and
Sydney
.
Overall
,
London
has the shortest
day time
Correct your spelling
daytime
show examples
while
New
York
and
Sydney
had similar sunshine
hours
. For
temperature
, New
York
and
London
have the same pattern of a line graph with slight differences;
however
,
Sydney
’s
temperature
is completely different from the other two. In
London
and New
York
, their
temperature
patterns look very similar to each other. In the first three months of the
year
, their average temperatures are lower than 15
degrees
while
Sydney
Change noun form
Sydney's
show examples
temperature
reaches 26
degrees
in January which is considered
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the hottest period
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
Sydney
. In the middle of the
year
, temperatures in New
York
and
London
increase significantly to reach the highest point at 29 and 24
degrees
respectively in July.
In contrast
, the
temperature
in
Sydney
drop dramatically and reach its lowest
temperature
at 16
degrees
in July.
At the end
of the
year
, the average temperatures of each city changed to be the same pattern as
the
Change preposition
at the
show examples
beginning of the
year
. New
York
is the city that has the longest annual
day time
Correct your spelling
daytime
show examples
which is 2535
hours
.
Sydney
’s
hours
are slightly lower than in New
York
by 62
hours
.
On the other hand
,
London
is considered to be the shortest
day time
Correct your spelling
daytime
show examples
city among the other two and the average annual
hours
are less than half of
Sydney
’s
hour
Fix the agreement mistake
hours
show examples
.
Submitted by rodridthanawat on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words temperature, hours, london, york, sydney, year, degrees with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "reaches" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.

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