The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of sunshine hours per year in three major city Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of sunshine hours per year in three major city

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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This
Linking Words
chart and table display the average
temperature
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in twelve months and annual sunshine
hours
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in 3 different cities respectively which are
London
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, New
York
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, and
Sydney
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.
Overall
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,
London
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has the shortest
day time
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daytime
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while
Linking Words
New
York
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and
Sydney
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had similar sunshine
hours
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. For
temperature
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, New
York
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and
London
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have the same pattern of a line graph with slight differences;
however
Linking Words
,
Sydney
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’s
temperature
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is completely different from the other two. In
London
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and New
York
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, their
temperature
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patterns look very similar to each other. In the first three months of the
year
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, their average temperatures are lower than 15
degrees
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while
Linking Words
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Sydney
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Sydney's
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temperature
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reaches 26
degrees
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in January which is considered
to
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apply
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the hottest period
of
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in
show examples
Sydney
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. In the middle of the
year
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, temperatures in New
York
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and
London
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increase significantly to reach the highest point at 29 and 24
degrees
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respectively in July.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
temperature
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in
Sydney
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drop dramatically and reach its lowest
temperature
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at 16
degrees
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in July.
At the end
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of the
year
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, the average temperatures of each city changed to be the same pattern as
the
Change preposition
at the
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beginning of the
year
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. New
York
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is the city that has the longest annual
day time
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daytime
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which is 2535
hours
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.
Sydney
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’s
hours
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are slightly lower than in New
York
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by 62
hours
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
London
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is considered to be the shortest
day time
Correct your spelling
daytime
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city among the other two and the average annual
hours
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are less than half of
Sydney
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’s
hour
Fix the agreement mistake
hours
show examples
.
Submitted by rodridthanawat on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words temperature, hours, london, york, sydney, year, degrees with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "reaches" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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