The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
The bar graph compares the proportion of Australian males and females in various
age
brackets who were frequently involved in physical activity in 2010.
Overall
, physical exercises were the most popular among the women aged between 45 to 54 and 55 to 64, whereas
the male members of the youngest age
group were more physically active than any other groups of men.
In details
, Fix the agreement mistake
detail
hefty
53.3% of female individuals Correct article usage
a hefty
at
the Change preposition
apply
age
of 45 to 54 worked out regularly, making it slightly more than those of 35-to-44 and 55-to-64 female age
groups (52.5% and 53% respectively). Meanwhile, the percentage of men who were aged between 15 and 24 was quite close to these figures with
52.8%. The women in Change preposition
at
25-to-34
Correct article usage
the 25-to-34
age
group came next
with 48.9%, as opposed to men’s 42.2%.
It is interesting to note that the figures for senior citizens of both genders averaged out at 47%. Similarly
, the proportion of female young adults accounted for just above 47%. Finally
, the remaining trends for the men
Change noun form
men's
age
brackets were equal or
less than 45%.Change preposition
to or
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words age with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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