Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In the contemporary world, it is common belief that participate in

unpaid

Suggestion

an unpaid community service program

community

Use synonyms

service

Use synonyms

program would be mandatory for greater

out comes

something that results

outcomes

in many aspects of humanity.

Although

Linking Words

, it is important to some parents would not agree to

this

Linking Words

because, they do not want their children to go out and clean the city at their younger age,

personally

Suggestion

personality

, I strongly believe that parents should encourage their children to do free

community

Use synonyms

work for a society. In the following essay, I will discuss

this

Linking Words

issue using some example to support my views and demonstrates points.

However

Linking Words

, the unpaid

community

Use synonyms

service

Use synonyms

should be compulsory to high

Suggestion

should compulsory to high school programmes have

should be compulsory to high school programmes have

school

Use synonyms

programmes have their own positive and negative sides and in following essay we will discuss them in detail.

First

Linking Words

of all, convincing argument can be that helping society with unpaid

community

Use synonyms

service

Use synonyms

is a good initiate to have a brighter future.

To begin

Linking Words

with, children should have taught to collect a donation for physically disabled people without any personal profit.

In other words

Linking Words

, if children learn to donate

money

Use synonyms

for a good cause at

school

Use synonyms

level,

then

Linking Words

it would be good help for the people who are handicapped;

therefore

Linking Words

, the same message they convey to their parents or friends and so that they will do the same. The

second

Linking Words

reason for my belief is that improving the

neighborhood

a surrounding or nearby region

neighbourhood

For instance

Linking Words

, children should have taught to clean their society by keeping the garbage in the garbage bag, do not throw the garbage outside in

public place

Suggestion

a public place

public places

;

as a result

Linking Words

there would be lesser disease and healthier life that would be beneficial for them.

Additionally

Linking Words

, teach sports to younger children is a good way to help each other who do not know how to play that any particular sport.

For example

Linking Words

, sometimes younger people feels hard to play some

sports but

Accept comma addition

sports, but

if they get a guidance from any other who is good at

this

Linking Words

then

Linking Words

that would be helpful for them. If these scenarios have merit,

then

Linking Words

conclusion

Suggestion

the conclusion

conclusions

drawn in the original argument is significantly strengthened.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, some arguments can be made that teaching

school

Use synonyms

children

to collect

Suggestion

collect

money

Use synonyms

for a donation would result harmful. The main reason for

this

Linking Words

is if one

children

Suggestion

child

collects more

money

Use synonyms

than

other

any of various alternatives; some other

another

then

Linking Words

they might feel sad while other might make misuse of

money

Use synonyms

they collected.

However

Linking Words

, closer examination would reveal that if the collection of

money

Use synonyms

by children is monitored by their parent or teacher

then

Linking Words

there would be less or almost no chance of misuse of

money

Use synonyms

. Apart from

this

Linking Words

further

Linking Words

analysis would make it clear that collecting

money

Use synonyms

for a good cause is always

good step

Suggestion

a good step

toward strong humanity. To sum up,

although

Linking Words

there are some benefits of not having

compulsion

Suggestion

a compulsion

the compulsion

to unpaid

community

Use synonyms

service

Use synonyms

at high

school

Use synonyms

programme, the advantages of having

compulsion

Suggestion

a compulsion

the compulsion

to do unpaid

community

Use synonyms

work

is surely outweigh

Suggestion

surely outweigh

its disadvantage. Having considered all the arguments above, I would concede that teaching children at

school

Use synonyms

level for helping others for free would always be a good habit.

Feb 9, 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

506 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

compulsory
high school programmes
unpaid community service
charity
improving the neighbourhood
teaching sports
sense of responsibility
empathy
broader perspective
societal issues
college applications
job applications
positive impact

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