The diagrams below show the design for a wave-energy machine and its location. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The
diagram
shows the machine
introducing energy by using the power
of waves. it is clear from the diagram
that, the mechanism of this
machine
and
Correct word choice
apply
emphasize
the way of transforming the Correct subject-verb agreement
emphasizes
power
of waves to
Change preposition
into
and
electric energy. And the Correct word choice
apply
second
diagram
shows, suggest two
location
Change to a plural noun
locations
according to
costs and the amount of energy producing
based Wrong verb form
produced
for
each site.
Change preposition
on
according to
diagram
number one
, we can noticed
thatChange the verb form
notice
,
the Remove the comma
apply
machine
has two
chambers, one
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
is locate
at the bottom of Change the verb form
is located
machine
that Add an article
the machine
allow
the wave and water Change the verb form
allows
comes
in, by the Change the verb form
come
power
of water pushing up and create a flow of air then
they enforce the turbine to move and by this
movement
the Add a comma
,movement
machine
introduce
electric Change the verb form
introduces
power
. however
, the two
places suggestion
, Replace the word
suggested
one
close to the land I will call it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
place
A and the other Add the particle
to place
one
offshore I will call it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
place
B, Add the particle
to place
place
one
less
cost but Change preposition
with less
introducing
Wrong verb form
introduces
low
amount of Add an article
the low
a low
power
and place
B, high
cost and Correct article usage
a high
introducing
Wrong verb form
introduces
large
amount of Change the article
a large
power
.
To sum up
, both places as we noticed, has
advantages and disadvantages, taking choices Correct subject-verb agreement
have
it
depends on the capital assets we are planning to spend and the risk Correct pronoun usage
apply
by
choosing between Change preposition
of
two
places .Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words diagram, machine, power, two, one, place with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "waves" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼