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Writing Samples
Band 5

many parents complain about violence promoted to their children through video games, tv programs and other media. Why is it happening? What can be the solution for it?

#parents #violence #children #video #games #tv #programs #media
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Nowadays, technology overcomes people. The trend of electronic devices
such
Linking Words
 as,
video
Use synonyms
 games, TV e
tc
Suggestion
has been raised drastically by the children who influence from its attractive features, good outlook. Many parents argue about violence increased t
o
Suggestion
in
their children through these factors.
This
Linking Words
 essay will explain about r
easons
Suggestion
the reasons
and solutions for
this
Linking Words
 complains.
Firstly
Linking Words
, children have been attracted to tv programs because their mother’s b
ehavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
when the child is in her womb. During the pregnancy, mothers mostly spend their time along with tv s
erials
similar things placed in order or happening one after another
series
or with other social m
edias.
a means or instrumentality for storing or communicating information
media
Although
Linking Words
, children learn from their parents and relatives who are using other media like, mobile phone. Children do not know what is wrong and what is right about. They just follow what they see and l
isten
perceive (sound) via the auditory sense
hear
from others.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, children influenced by their same aged adolescents. They get to know about
video
Use synonyms
 games b
y
Suggestion
with
their friends who has already been playing
video
Use synonyms
 games. In
this
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 era, parents’ s
howoff
Suggestion
show off
like rich p
eople and
Accept comma addition
people, and
they buy
such
Linking Words
 a
Suggestion
an
expensive
video
Use synonyms
 games for their children. And, at the e
nd end,
either extremity of something that has length
end
end, end
 they complain about the violence in their c
hildren which
Accept comma addition
children, which
is raised by
video
Use synonyms
 games.
However
Linking Words
, parents have solutions to keep their children away from
such
Linking Words
 devices.
Instead
Linking Words
 of buying expensive
video
Use synonyms
 games, parents should buy creative games by which children can open their mind by incredible creativity. Parents should support children to play outdoor games which keep physically healthy and keep developed mind. To put in a nutshell, by scrutinizing conclusion, there is parents’ responsibility to keep their children free from violence through tv programs,
video
Use synonyms
 games and other media. Parents should concentrate on their children’s proper bringing up.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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