Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations, Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations

A group of people believes that it is good to adjust to all problems like not

fulfilled

Wrong verb form

fulfilling

show examples

jobs and low finance. Other party thinks that people need to put effort into developing a lifestyle. To form a judicious opinion a discussion is essential, where I stand with the second group. On the one hand, the person needs to accept and to all

issues

Add a comma

,issues

show examples

inactivity is to reduce the happiness of the individual. To explain, people not involved

to develop

Change preposition

in developing

show examples

their lifestyle and maintaining the same situation from

starting

Wrong verb form

the start

show examples

leads to a major crisis and

affect

Correct subject-verb agreement

affects

show examples

the new

generation

Change noun form

generation's

show examples

growth in society.

For example

, in a family

parent

Fix the agreement mistake

parents

show examples

always

constant

Change the word

constantly

show examples

in growth as they are afraid to take a risk

as a result

, children get average benefits like low education and basic needs.

Thus

, it is

clearly

Change the word

clear

show examples

steady

living-pattern

Correct your spelling

living pattern

show examples

results in less growth

in-home

Correct your spelling

in home

show examples

members.

On the other hand

, try to improve family welfare and reduce issues to promote comfort. To elaborate, good work with a nice salary

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

show examples

guaranty

Replace the word

guarantee

show examples

and reduces stress. Financial issues create critical

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

situation

Fix the agreement mistake

situations

show examples

due to

hopelessness.

For instance

Correct word choice

if a

show examples

person meets an emergency,

first,

he or she thinks about money because they need to clear catastrophe. To live a pleasant family improvement is essential for the individual

as well as

society.

Thus

, it is evident promotion is necessary for all sole.

To conclude

, I think fixed jobs and poor financial status

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

negative impacts,

while

, changes with modification in the soul

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

benefits.

Due to

this

reason, I support the second group.

Submitted by ajithajesus1st on Fri Feb 21 2020

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coherence and cohesion

Improve syntax and cohesion. Some sentences are hard to understand due to grammatical inconsistencies.

task response

Increase clarity and specificity of ideas. Some points made are too vague and do not effectively communicate your ideas.

lexical resource

Enhance usage of complex sentences and paraphrase key words and phrases to avoid repetition.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

adversity
resilience
stoicism
contentment
cope
adapt
endure
persevere
settle
ambition
tenacious
determined
resourceful
optimistic
self-improvement
proactive
initiative
transform
overcome
confront

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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations, Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweight the disadvantages?

Compare and contrast eating out and cooking at home

hese days internet-based courses have become a popular alternative to university-based courses. Some students prefer this type of learning because they do not need to attend lectures. Others argue that it is important to study at university. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Many countries spend large amounts of money on preparing competitors for major world sporting events such as the Olympic Games and football World Cup. Instead, this money can be spent on encouraging children to take up sports at a young age.To what extent do you agree or disagree?