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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that women should be treated as equal as men when applying for a job with police or the military.Others think women are less suitable for this kind of job. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

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One of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is giving equal employment opportunity to women by recruiting them as a member of
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police
Suggestion
the police force
a police force
force
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 as well as in the country's military.As
such
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 there are both merits and demerits to
this
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 trend,
although
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 I am of the opinion that the latter outdo the former. There are a number of arguments in favour of my stance. The most preponderant one is that the female does not have the strength and stamina required for
such
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 a strenuous job. Not only can oestrogen hormones in women make them less capable of achieving their goal in these jobs, making them less powerful than men physically, but it can
also
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 make them emotionally less fitted than men when to handling difficult situations
such
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 as facing severely injured people or horrible accident scenes. Needless to say, all these disadvantages have far-reaching impact on the country's security. There are,
however
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, some benefits that can easily overwhelm the potential pitfalls of employing women in
police
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 and military
force
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. The primary one stems from the fact that women possess nurturing and caring attributes that can be of benefit and ideal as medics in the army.
Besides
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, females hired in
police
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force
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 play an important role in those societies where males are restricted to touch females.
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 but not least the rights for ladies to choose their profession would widen the spectrum of job availability and they would
also
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 earn and serve their country by joining
such
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 kind of honourable services. In view of the argument outlined above, one can conclude that despite some benefits the drawbacks of women applying for job with
police
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 or military
force
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 are indeed too dire to ignore.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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