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Band 4.5

• Many young people now know more about international pop and move star than famous in the history of their country. Give the cause and solution to encourage people to know more about their history

#people #pop #move #star #history #country
Nowadays, many people are less knowledgeable at their
countrys
Suggestion
country's
countries
country
 historical famous persons than international pop and
move
a form of entertainment that enacts a story by sound and a sequence of images giving the illusion of continuous movement
movie
 star. The main reason is that today minority are interested in historical
faces
a powerful effect or influence
forces
 and in the same time those historical people have not learned at all yet. The most obvious solutions are can be to increase interest of nation at historical people and find out more about them. People prefer watching
movie
Suggestion
movies
a movie
the movie
 or listening to music more than learning something new about their
countys
Suggestion
county's
countries
counties
 historical faces.
This
 is because many people do not like reading and receiving new information about what they are not keen on. It is not secret that people will not acquire a lot on what they work if they do not do spontaneously. So we should reach their interest on historical face. The most obvious answer is to show them their
countrys
Suggestion
country's
country
 legends of the past on movies in main and sing in songs.
As a result
, they become aware of great people and start looking for more details. Another reason of these
process
Suggestion
processes
 is those historical people are not being searched enough well. There are many names to peak as an
example who
Accept comma addition
example, who
 had done a number of useful stuffs in field
such
 as society, economy, science, literature, art and
etc
of a thing, of it; possessive form of "it"
its
; Unfortunately, we cannot find anywhere so much related to their life, the way how
did they achieved
Suggestion
did they achieve
did they achieved
 or discovered something and other information that are interested
by
Suggestion
in
 people, because historians have not studied out. One possibility is government should support historic scholars financially and provide with all needed equipments, so they can investigate more intensively for historical faces.
Consequently
, people will be able to learn more. In conclusion, less knowledge of people at historical faces can be solved by searching more about historical persons and increasing peoples interest
toward
Suggestion
to
 them. 303 words
Submitted by akmalkarimov164 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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