People are using a lot of online language translation app.Do the benefits of these outweigh the disadvantages?

By the advent of urbanization and the Internet, many people these days live in a nuclear family, with either a single parent or parents not married, as well as isolated from neighbours due to over involvement in mobile phones and the computers. It is often argued whether to find out about one’s family
history
and keeping records is a positive or negative thing. I believe it’s always better to have a family record and in
this
essay I would state my points and the reasons for the same.
To begin
, many
household
Suggestion
households
nowadays have a good
organization
Suggestion
organizational
structure of their lineage, they often have meetings, prayers, picnics and parties and
this
would ensure they are always surrounded by someone who love them, as said blood is always thicker than water. These people from common ancestry, even open schools and businesses, which in
future
Suggestion
the future
could provide job opportunities and schooling for economic backward individuals from the family.
Furthermore
,
today many
Accept comma addition
today, many
illnesses have
genetic link
Suggestion
a genetic link
genetic links
, means the disease runs in the family,
hence
, keeping a family
history
and family records of morbidities and mortalities could ensure better treatment for some young ones in the family.
For example
, recently an article in the Times of India showed a 3-year-old boy died of liver cancer, who started with abdominal pain, and eventually died, which was never accepted by the parents until they recognized that their descents had a strong
history
of liver cancer;
this
could have been avoided if the guardians knew about the illness in their roots.
On the other hand
, some people believe that it would affect the privacy of the person to be involved in any
families
Suggestion
family
organization and in
this
busy world there is no time for anyone to waste.
However it
Accept comma addition
However, it
is an excuse
from
Suggestion
for
those who doesn’t want to socialize. To conclude, I believe family
history
gives people an opportunity to have
get
Suggestion
gotten
together meetings and it would help to identify the diseases that runs in the family.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: