IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Many people assume that the goal of every country should be to produce more materials and goods. To what extent do you agree or disagree that constantly increasing production in an appropriate goal?

#people #country #materials #goods #production
In these days, there has appeared a hotly debated topic of whether producing more materials and goods is the primary target of every country in the world. Some people believe that maintaining a gradual increase of production is
appropriate goal
Suggestion
an appropriate goal
, whereas others oppose
this
 statement as it can
has
Suggestion
have
 negative impacts on
economy
Suggestion
the economy
 and environment of countries. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with
this
 statement due to some following reasons.
This
first
 reason is that economically, aggregate supply is dependent on aggregate demand.
This
 means that before producing goods and materials, governments and corporations need to calculate how much money citizens spend on goods or materials or how productivity is enough for people’ demand. If they provide commodities and services excessively, there will appears an economic crisis, which damages
national economy
Suggestion
the national economy
 dramatically.
This
 is because redundant of goods that companies cannot sell would lead them to bankruptcy. In the
second
 place, increasing production can help countries improve GDP.
However
, GDP is not a good measure to rate development of nations because it does not mention serious problems
such
 as
environment
Suggestion
environmental
 pollution which is caused as consequences of the excessive industrial development. If governments do not enact laws on protecting the environment and regulating
strictly
Suggestion
strictest
strict
stricter
 standards of emission of industrial factories,
this
 affects
heath
a healthy state of wellbeing free from disease
health
 of residents significantly. In conclusion,
although
 developing production is an important goal of countries, governments cannot
sacrify
endure the loss of
sacrifice
 other national targets in order to accompany it.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: