IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that it is better to have the same job throughout their life while others think that people should change their job after some period of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #job #life #change #period #time
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Many individuals often change their working place which has a number of reliable arguments. cl
early,
Suggestion
Clearly
the reasons for
this
Linking Words
 are
job
Use synonyms
 satisfaction, expected monthly salary, a field of interest, working environment and many more. ce
rtain c
Suggestion
Certain
ommunity as
sert t
Suggestion
asserts
hat it is more convenient to have a constant paid position for a whole
life
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, others oppose
this
Linking Words
 statement that em
ployee s
Suggestion
the employee
an employee
hould gradually switch working environment within a period of time.
th
Linking Words
is e
Suggestion
This
ssay will discuss why diversification in lo
ng-term i
Suggestion
the long-term
s necessary for the overall growth of
or
Use synonyms
ganisation a
Suggestion
the organisation
organisations
nd wo
rkman
Suggestion
workmen
a workman
in the below following paragraph To co
mments w
Suggestion
comment
ith, there is
a
Suggestion
are
 number of valid reasons for working with the same
organisation
Use synonyms
 throughout
life
Use synonyms
.
fi
Linking Words
rstly,
Suggestion
Firstly
employees ge
t t
Suggestion
gets
remendous benefits from their
company
Use synonyms
. Whereas, if an employee stays at the same place for a long time, they would win the trust of the management from their loyalty towards works.
As a result
Linking Words
, the workers would be provided promotion, mo
ney bonus,
Accept comma addition
money, bonus
fa
mily
Accept comma addition
family, Life
Life
Use synonyms
 insurance, travel trips and many other considerable benefits. fo
r a
Suggestion
For
n instant, the majority of a multinational
company
Use synonyms
 in India pr
ovide a
Suggestion
provides
n expensive yearly bonus to the older and experienced worker to encourage their performance and enhance their productivity.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a stable working atmosphere is better for the overall growth of employees.
Secondly
Linking Words
, workmen can reside at the same place throughout
life
Use synonyms
. as
s
Suggestion
As
taff have a stable
job
Use synonyms
 in a
company
Use synonyms
 that he or she can live with their family without spontaneous change of living area.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the everlasting same type of work for wage earners can be feeling bored day after day that would be directly affected by industrial productivity. it
i
Suggestion
It
s a human tendency to feel bo
redom f
Suggestion
the boredom
o
r c
Suggestion
of
onstant working.
mo
Linking Words
reover,
in addition
Moreover
if people are continuously doing the equal activity they may gradually lead to di
srelish t
Suggestion
owards work. For these reasons, workers cannot invest their 100% efficiency in task completion. ow
ing t
Suggestion
Owing
o
this
Linking Words
, the
organisation
Use synonyms
 would face the la
ke o
the state of needing something that is absent or unavailable
lack
f productivity.
he
Linking Words
nce,
(used to introduce a logical conclusion) from that fact or reason or as a result
Hence
people should diverse
job
Use synonyms
 field with regard to their interest. In conclusion, pursuing a lifelong
job
Use synonyms
 in the same
organisation
Use synonyms
 has numerous benefits for monetary growth, but changes in
life
Use synonyms
 are necessary for enthusiastic livelihood. Personally, I believe that employee should change their wa
y a
Suggestion
ways
fter getting various experience in any particular industry or
company
Use synonyms
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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