IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.

The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.
#information #water #consumption #two #countries
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line graph and table show the data
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
global
Change the word
globally
show examples
 and in two different nations.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 all sectors
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
water
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
 worldwide saw a gradual increase over the hundred
Use synonyms
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
.
Also
Linking Words
,
Braxil
Correct your spelling
Brazil
 receive the highest proportion of
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 per person in 2000. From
Use synonyms
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 1900 to
Use synonyms
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 1950, the
water
Use synonyms
 usage of agriculture increased steadily by approximately 1000 cubic
kilometres
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 industrial
use
Use synonyms
 and domestic
use
Use synonyms
 remained stable in the
ten
Add a hyphen
ten-year
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 period. After the
year
Use synonyms
 1950, we can see that the figure for agricultural
water
Use synonyms
 usage had significant growth and reached its peak
just
Change preposition
of just
show examples
 around 3000 cubic
kilometres
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 the
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 of the industry accounted for just over 1000 cubic
kilometres
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, domestic
use
Use synonyms
 only rose by 500 cubic
kilometres
Use synonyms
 from 1900 to 2000. In the
year
Use synonyms
 2000, Brazil had
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 of 359 cubic
kilometres
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 Congo only accounted for 8 cubic
kilometres
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, Brazil had the largest population of 176 million and irrigated land at 26500 square
kilometres
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 Congo only represented hundred times as small
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
population and irrigated land.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, consumption, use, year, kilometres with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: