Some believe that men and women are equal and so women are able to do any job they want. Others feel that men women are not equal and therefore there certain jobs that are not suitable for women. What is your opinion?
Some people are of the notion that men and
women
are not equal and for that matter, they shouldn't be offered the same job opportunities. Others, however
, oppose such
view
. In my opinion, Correct article usage
a view
women
and men are not on the same wavelength and as such
they shouldn't be granted the same work
opportunities like
men for various reasons which Change preposition
as
this
essay will throw more light on.
To begin
, women
are exceptionally good at so many things and seems
to fill in very well wherever they find themselves and Change the verb form
seem
as a result
of
Change preposition
apply
that
they tend to deliver effectively Correct word choice
apply
at
their various professions. But to give them the same professional, chances Change preposition
in
like
their Change preposition
as
Male
counterparts in the same field will be catastrophic to their Fix capitalization
male
well being
. Take mine, Add a hyphen
well-being
for instance
, women
cannot function in this
field because it requires an
enormous physical strength and power. Remove the article
apply
Women
who find themselves in this
area of work
acquire serious health problems in life. Some develop issues with infertility due to
the vibration of the equipment and machines they use on the site. Machines like drilling, excavators and bulldozers produces
Change the verb form
produce
great
amount of vibration.
Add an article
a great
In addition
to the aforementioned reason above, most women
leave gaps that usually needed
to be filled temporarily at various Wrong verb form
need
work places
Correct your spelling
workplaces
due to
maternity leave. This
puts a magnificent amount of pressure on organisations and companies. For example
, a female surgeon who is on maternity leave will eventually leave a huge hole in her post and thus
puts
pressure on the hospital to seek a replacement for the short term. Many Wrong verb form
put
women
more often than not experience familiar health issues associated with women
and because of this
they sometimes absent themselves from work
and this
affects job performance and productivity.
To conclude
, yes, we live in an equality era where the emphasis on both sexes are
without partiality, but I strongly believe that certain professions are not suitable for Change the verb form
is
women
and such
should be left alone for their male counterparts.Correct quantifier usage
apply
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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction that presents the main topic and the writer's opinion. The conclusion is also unclear and does not effectively summarize the main points. The essay lacks a logical structure and the sequencing of ideas is not cohesive.
task achievement
The essay provides some relevant ideas, but the response does not fully address the prompt. The reasoning is not clear and the arguments lack depth. More specific examples and a more comprehensive exploration of the topic are needed.