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Band 5.5

Rich countries should allow jobs for skilled and knowledgeable employees who are from poor countries. Do you agree or disagree?

#countries #jobs #employees
In the modern day along with the enhancement with the technology and travel, tourist and scientists are now capable of
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
 to rural areas
such
 as
South Pole
Suggestion
the South Pole
. In
this
 essay I intend to discuss the pros and cons of these journeys.
In
Suggestion
On
 one hand,
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
 to remote areas has multiple benefits not only to the traveller but
also
 for the rest of the society in our global village. How? The scientists and the travellers who go on these unique expeditions will make new discoveries of the unseen by the public eye. Most of the scientists who visit these rural areas will start their research and the finding on the unseen nature will contribute to the modern medicine and enhance the living standards.
Furthermore
, it will
also
 assist to preserve and learn endangered species
such
 as Polo Bears in their own habitat.
On the other hand
, there are some downsides for these expeditions as well. These unique tours will not be cheap, due to higher risks
on
Suggestion
of
 accidents in harsh weather conditions and
etc
of a thing, of it; possessive form of "it"
its
, the transportation owners will provide a heavy bill to travellers and scientists.
Further
 not all transportation owners will agree on these rural tours even the traveller is willing to pay an
extra ordinary
beyond what is ordinary or usual; highly unusual or exceptional or remarkable
extraordinary
 fee.
In addition
 to the cost there are other factors
such
 as danger from animals or affected by hyperthermia due to harsh
climate even
Accept comma addition
climate, even
 though the travellers or the scientists prepared for the extreme cold. In Conclusion, I pen
down saying
Accept comma addition
down, saying
 there are both advantages and disadvantages tourists and scientists
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
 to remote areas
such
 as
South Pole
Suggestion
the South Pole
.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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