Some people think that having a set retirement age (e.g. 65 years) for everybody, regardless of occupation, is unfair. They believe that certain workes deserve to retire and receive a pension at an earlier age. Do you agree or disagree? Which types of workers do you think should benefit from early retirement?

A
standar
a basis for comparison; a reference point against which other things can be evaluated
standard
age
of
retirement
(65
for example
) is considered unfair for certain
demographis
of or relating to demography
demographics
demographic
of society, because they think that some workers have the right to retire and receive a pension at an earlier
age
.
However
, I don’t agree with that, for the reason that I feel that the health has had several
advance
Suggestion
advances
in the
last
two decades.
Hence
, a person with is 65 years still looks like very good and they can be a great contribution
for
Suggestion
to
in
the workplace. Nowadays, population in
development
Suggestion
developing
developed
countries is majority elder.
Therefore
, governments spend many resources
in
Suggestion
to
support the health of
this
group of individuals. The
retirement
is not always a good option for people that
have spend
Suggestion
have spent
their entire life in a workplace, rather
this
situation could create more
pyschological
mental or emotional as opposed to physical in nature
psychological
problems. In fact, the end of a labour era, cause in some cases depressions,
as a result
that
this
workers
Suggestion
worker
do not know
Suggestion
does not know
what doing with their time, because their life was the job. In my opinion, all kinds of
workes
buildings for carrying on industrial labor
works
workers
, independent of their gender, ought have the same
retirement
.
For instance
, currently in Chile, the individuals that belong to
army
Suggestion
the army
have earlier pension.
This
situation is unfair, because I consider that
this
sorts
Suggestion
sort
of jobs do not have a great contribution
for
Suggestion
to
in
society.
Other
Suggestion
Another
case is the women, they in
this
country finish their labour world with 60 years, which is not fair, because nowadays we fight for the
equallity
the quality of being the same in quantity or measure or value or status
equality
quality
for men and women, so the fair is that everyone would have their pension at the same
age
. In conclusion, a group of the population
consider
Suggestion
considers
that the
age
of
retirement
should be different for some works, though that I do not agree for the reason that the work is part essential of the one person, so if decrease the
age
, probably, would be a problem for the government and perhaps for our health.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: