The line graph indicated the information about the number of questionnaires collected from Tourist Information office in a city based on individual, letter/email and telephone by first 6 months in 2011.

The line graph indicated the information about the number of questionnaires collected from Tourist Information office in a city based on individual, letter/email and telephone by first 6 months in 2011.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The line graph indicated the information about the number of questionnaires collected from Tourist Information office in a city based on individual, letter/email and telephone by first 6 months in 2011.
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The line graph indicated the information about the number of questionnaires collected from
Tourist
Correct article usage
the Tourist

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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Information office in a city based on individual, letter/email and telephone
by
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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first
Correct article usage
the first

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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6 months
in
Change preposition
of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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2011.
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it was obvious that it had an
in significant
Correct your spelling
insignificant

The word in significant seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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increase
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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directive
respond
Replace the word
responses

The word respond doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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from people and letters, but
person
Add an article
the person

The noun phrase person seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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was the most common way
from
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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followed March.
While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

an
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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enquires by telephone went down rapidly and get
a
Change the article
the

It appears that the phrase a lowest number does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

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lowest number compared to others. Looking at the graph more closely, one can see that individual numbers
was
Change the verb form
were

The singular verb was does not appear to agree with the plural subject individual numbers. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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lowest
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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January, approximately 400,
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

an upward trend was seen
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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that and reached a
pick
Correct your spelling
peak

The word pick doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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June, around 1900.
In contrast
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, telephone requirements
was
Change the verb form
were

The singular verb was does not appear to agree with the plural subject requirements. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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highest in the new year,
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it
Correct pronoun usage
they

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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plummeted moderately and picked
at
Change preposition
up at

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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1600
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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June, lower than
by
Change preposition
per

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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person
Add an article
a person

The noun phrase person seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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. Thought it had a decrease from January to February.
Finally
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the amount of phone enquiries fall dramatically
by
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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over
first
Correct article usage
the first

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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five months and hit a low of roughly 280
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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May,
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it remained nearly constant until June.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "indicated" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Questionnaire
  • Tourist Information Office
  • Individual submission
  • Letter/email communication
  • Telephone survey
  • Fluctuation
  • Stable trend
  • Gradual increase
  • Varied patterns
  • Surpassed
  • Significant rise
  • Seasonal peak
  • Tourist behavior
  • Information campaign
What to do next:
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