IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The table below gives information about changes in modes of travel in England between 1985 and 2000. Describe the information in the table and make comparisons where appropriate.

The table below gives information about changes in modes of travel in England between 1985 and 2000. Describe the information in the table and make comparisons where appropriate.
#information #changes #modes #travel #england #comparisons
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In
this
 day and age, ways of improving health have appeared to be a hotly debated issue in daily
lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
.
However
, the more advanced medical treatments are, the more expensive they seem to be,
hence
 the poor cannot get
access
 to modern medical services. Some people argue that both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the affluent and the poor should have the right to get medical treatments equally. Personally, I completely agree with
this
 idea and believe that people’s
access
 to proper health care should not depend on the level of their incomes. It is undeniable that
middle
Correct article usage
the middle
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 and lower classes have taken more serious diseases than the upper
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
due to
 their lack of medical facilities, their shortage of
health-realted
Correct your spelling
health-related
 information and especially exorbitant fees .
Consequently
, the current situation is mainly the wealthy, not the needy, can approach
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the best medical treatments.
This
 negative trend should be dealt with by letting the poor get
access
 to advanced medical services.
Furthermore
, the main aim of inventing modern
health care
Correct your spelling
healthcare
show examples
 methods is improving people’s lives, and the mission of every hospital is to try their best to save and help their patients recover.
Therefore
, there should not have any discrimination against the poor during the curing process.
This
 is not only the moral of a doctor
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
 a humanitarian aspect. In conclusion, every citizen has the right to
access
 modern medical achievements irrespective of their financial status.
Also
, the authorities should take actions to assist the poor.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the first paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words access with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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