IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant examples if necessary.

#salary #job #satisfaction
Huge wage is much
benificial
promoting or enhancing well-being
beneficial
 when compared to
work
fulfillment
a feeling of satisfaction at having achieved your desires
fulfilment
. I strongly believe that big salary is much more important that
job
 satisfaction.
First
 of all, I support my opinion that people earn high wage they feel happy and motivated regardless
to
Suggestion
of
 satisfaction with
job
Suggestion
a job
the job
.
This
 is why because when they get good payment they will be encouraged and
bllisful
completely happy and contented
blissful
 in turn
work
 hard to accomplish their goals and move on in their career, resulting in good health and stress-free
life
.
As a result
,
this
 would benefit both the individual and the company as well.
For
instance in
Accept comma addition
instance, in
 2010, in China there was
yearly performance
Suggestion
a yearly performance
the yearly performance
 of a firm which exponentially grew after they announce an increase in salary to their employees.
so
to a very great extent or degree
So
 drawing high stipend will ensure happiness and motivation even though they are not satisfied with their
job
.
Secondly
, money is essential for survival and living.
In other words
, to lead a comfortable and
endurant
the power to withstand hardship or stress
endurance
life
one
Suggestion
One
 has to
work
 for more income than finding self-satisfaction
job
.
Moreover
,
this
 can lead a luxurious lifestyle and provide decent well-being for their family.
For example
, some film stars who are not passionate about acting still
work
 for only good money to comfort themselves with high-end
life
 and endurance.
Thus
, to enjoy and be successful in
life
 one has to draw
huge salary
Suggestion
huge salaries
a huge salary
 so as to ensure good and happy
life
 for his family even if it does not appeal to you at all. To sum up, More money making is advantageous though your
work
 does not give you a sense of
fulfillment
a feeling of satisfaction at having achieved your desires
fulfilment
 and I fully go with my choice that it bound us with contentment, inspiration and peaceful
life
 ahead.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • remuneration
  • financial security
  • motivation
  • luxuries
  • material possessions
  • fulfillment
  • work-life balance
  • stress levels
  • mental well-being
  • job security
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