IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people believe that the fast pace and stress of modern life is having a negative effect on families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #pace #stress #life #effect #families
There is currently
contentious argument
Suggestion
a contentious argument
 over whether family is being
homed
cause or do harm to
harmed
 by very high speed and pressure of contemporary Lifestyle I totally agree with
this
 opinion because the fast pace leads to less
time
 for families to be together and stress leads to arguments among family members. The main reason why I believe family
life
 is being a composed is because families have less
time
 to be with each other.
This
 is due to family members being busy at work and with their social lives as well as
this
plural of "this"
these
 people have many things they have to do these days
such
 as Checking email operating their online social status and so less.
time
Suggestion
Time
 is left for family
life
. To illustrate, I spend about 2 hours online every night attending to daily correspondence before chatting with my family members, whereas
,
Accept space
,
2 years ago, I would spend
time
 with my family as soon as I walked in the door. Another reason why
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 support the notion that families are being impacted negatively is that the pressure of
life
 these days means that even when families do get together arguments are more likely.
This
 is because everyone
feel
Suggestion
feels
 tired and they are more likely to
get irritated and to
Suggestion
get irritated and
 react to their heightened emotional
life
 level. In conclusion, I completely agree that the Rapid Pace and stressful nature of contemporary Lifestyle are having negative consequences
on
Suggestion
for
life
 relationships.
This
 is because family members have less
time
 and when they are together they feel less relaxed. Given the
situtation it
Accept comma addition
situation, it
situation it
seem
Suggestion
seems
 that family members should try to be more
spportive
furnishing support or assistance
supportive
to
Suggestion
of
 one another and
also parents need to
Suggestion
parents also need to
 set aside regular
time
 for families to relax together.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: