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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think a country benefits from a large proportion of young university students, others think sending young people to universities only lead to graduate unemployment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #country #proportion #university #students #universities #graduate #unemployment
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With the advanced education, the
number
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 of undergraduates has been increasing. Some insist that a
number
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 of
university
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 students only lead the unemployment rate of high-educated people to rise and it is not beneficial for
society
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.
Although
Linking Words
 I understand
this
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 opinion, I would argue that the large proportion of undergraduates has positive effects on
society
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. Admittedly, there are some disadvantages to the increasing
number
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 of
university
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 students.
To begin
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 with, many young people may put pressure on having a bachelor's degree by themselves, even though they are not interested in
university
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.
For example
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, in Korea, almost people in modern
society
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 tend to go to
unversities
the body of faculty and students at a university
university
universities
 after
graduated
Suggestion
graduating
 from high school. Some
peolpe
(plural) any group of human beings (men or women or children) collectively
people
 might not try to have enough time to think what they want to be.
Therefore
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, some
poelpe
(plural) any group of human beings (men or women or children) collectively
people
 could end up dropping out of their schools.
As a result
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, they might lose tuition fees and their time to search for their goals.
However
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, I still believe that well-educated people influence
society
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 positively. Programmes aimed at preparing global competition for employment help
university
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 students to find high quality job.
Also
Linking Words
, these well-educated people can improve their ability, competing with people who are from everywhere in
Use synonyms
university
Suggestion
the university
. It is a proved fact that intelligent people can bring about more benefit for economic growth than physical workers.
As a result
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, developing the level of education can lead to a national growth in many ways. In conclusion, according to the aforementioned reasons, the increasing
number
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 of undergraduates might have a negative effect on individuals, but I believe that
this
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 should be seen as a positive development in many ways.
Submitted by kyunghea325 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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