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Writing Samples
Band 3

Two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992

Two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992
The total comparison of manual and non-manual occupation among men and women in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 in the span of 1992 is the main objective of the provided pie charts. In
general
Change the article
a general
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 manner, both
of
Change preposition
apply
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genders constituted the remarkable increase in
other manual
Change the wording
another manual
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 which was the
second
Linking Words
 biggest. It is clear fact that
although
Linking Words
 clerical or related made up the highest figures
of
Change preposition
for
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 females working, at 31%, the rate of male working
decline
Wrong verb form
declined
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 to 6%. Craft or similar
exprienced
Correct your spelling
experienced
 an over eighth-fold increase to 24%from 3%. Both genders who worked
on
Change preposition
as
show examples
 general labourers (approximately 2%)
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 recorded which was much smaller than
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 -24%. The most dominant percentage of the managerial and professional was occupied in figures of men occupation (36%)
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 sector comprised a tiny lower 29% in women working. There was a marginal development in the portion of male-6% compare with
proportion
Add an article
the proportion
a proportion
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 of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
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 working (9%)

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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