the pie charts below shop the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

#shop #sales #sectors #zealand #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The pie charts illustrate

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

retail sectors of online shopping sales in New Zealand between 2003 and 2013. There are

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

travel

film

or music,

books

and

clothes

. In 2003,

travel

have a lot of retail sectors of online shopping sales more than another.

Travel

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

precise

Correct article usage

a precise

show examples

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

of the total.

Clothes

have approximately 24 proportions.

film

and music have 21 chunks. And

books

have a little

Change preposition

apply

show examples

retail sectors of online shopping sales

less

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

than another.

Books

have only 19

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

of the total. In 2013,

film

and soul have 33

ratio

Change to a plural noun

ratios

show examples

more than

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

Travel

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

Books

and

clothes

have 22

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

and 16 fee sequent.

According to

travel

in 2003

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

more than in 2013 approximately 7

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

Clothes

in 2003 have more than 2013 around 8 interests.

Book

Fix the agreement mistake

Books

show examples

in 2003

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

less than

2013

Change preposition

in 2013

show examples

around 3

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

. And

film

or music has less than 2013 approximately 12

rate

Change to a plural noun

rates

show examples

Sat Apr 18 2020

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Add more linking words.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words travel, film, books, clothes, percent with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

155 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

retail sectors
online shopping sales
percentage increase/decrease
significant growth/decline
electronic goods
clothing and footwear
food and beverages
household goods
recreational goods
stable sales
emerging sectors
overall growth
decade comparison
shift in consumer behavior
e-commerce
trend analysis
market dynamics
purchasing habits

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the pie charts below shop the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Some people think reading stories in books is better than watching TV or playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that anyone can create art such as painting, poetry, music and so on. Others think that a person should have special abilities to create art. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is a growing demand for fresh water nowadays and this is becoming a global problem. What are the causes and solutions?