IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#expenditure #three #categories #age #groups #residents #uk #information #features #comparisons
The given line chart illustrated the amount of
money
spends
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 by five categories among the different
age
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
British citizens in the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2004. A large number of
money
 spend on food and drinks
at
Change preposition
for at
show examples
 least
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
under 30 and the highest amounts spend by 76+.
To begin
 with, the highest amount of
money
spending
Replace the word
spent
show examples
 on food and drink in all
age
 groups, except that under 30.
As well as
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
 spending
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 76+.
In addition
, restaurants, and hotels
popular
Add a missing verb
are popular
show examples
 among all
age
 groups, except for 61-75 and 75+, the number
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
percentages like 2% and 7% spending
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
respectively.
Moreover
, the highest percentage
spending
Change preposition
of spending
show examples
 on entertainment
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was
61
Correct article usage
the 61
show examples
-75
age
group
,
as
Change preposition
at
show examples
 around almost 23%.
As well as
 6%,
7
Correct word choice
and 7
show examples
%, spending
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
under 30
age
group
 and
31
Correct article usage
the 31
show examples
-45
age
group
 respectively.
In addition
,
46
Correct article usage
the 46
show examples
-60 and 76+
ages
Change the noun form
age
show examples
group
 percentage rank
similarly
 equal
like as
Change preposition
at
show examples
 14% and 13% respectively.
Overall
, it is clearly observed that the highest amount of
money
 spends on food and drinks
as well as
 a restaurant and hotels.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "as well as, in addition".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words money, age, group with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Expenditure
  • Categories
  • Age groups
  • Residents
  • Summarize
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Trends
  • Patterns
  • Spending habits
  • Life stages
  • Childcare costs
  • Healthcare costs
  • Outliers
  • Economic factors
  • Social factors
  • Cultural factors
  • Leisure activities
  • Financial outlays
  • Demographics
  • Percentage
  • Allocation of funds
  • Consumption
  • Discretionary spending
  • Essential expenses
  • Generational differences
  • Income bracket
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