Nowadays children watch a lot of TV and play video games. However, some people think that these activities are not good for a child's mental health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#children #tv #video #games #people #activities #child #health

Many parents try to reduce their children's addiction to

and

video

games. They claim that these entertainments could harm the mental health of the children.

Although

I agree that watching

and playing

video

games are mentally harmful, there are benefits offered by these activities as well. Parents have been wary of the presence of

and

video

games among children. They are justifiably worried about various harmful contents, specifically violence contained in

and

video

games.

This

substance can convey a wrong message that violence is justified. As an example, underage boys who watch boxing on the

sometimes apply what they watch in real life by punching their friends whenever they are fighting. The bad

behavior

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviour

developed by watching these programs could affect the growth of the children, which could potentially lead them to become aggressive later on.

Conversely

, if leveraged correctly,

and

video

games can provide multiple benefits for their audience. Aside from violent substances, there are other

shows and games that can be

educative

Suggestion

educated

. These types of entertainment have the ability to increase specific skills.

For instance

video

games about farming can trigger the curiosity of the children to learn about agriculture, while

shows about an educational quiz can encourage them to study many subjects in a more interesting way.

Thus

, parents can identify and limit the type of activities involving electronic screens that can be beneficial for their kids. To conclude,

although

I agree that

and

video

games bring disadvantages, I

also

believe that

shows and

video

games should still present in children's lives to be rightly used as an attractive

education

Suggestion

educational

tool.

Submitted by alfianamoudy on Fri Apr 24 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

274 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Nowadays children watch a lot of TV and play video games. However, some people think that these activities are not good for a child's mental health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some believe children should be taught to give speeches and presentations in school. Why is this? What other skills do you think it is important to be taught in schools?

It is better for college students to live on campus than live at home with their parents. To what extent do you agree with this idea?

The mass media, including television, radio and newspapers, have great influence in shaping people’s ideas. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, the widespread use of the Internet has given people more freedom to work or study at home instead of travelling to work or college. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages?