IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people think that teenagers should follow what the old people say whereas some believe that it is good for teenage people to challenge what old people say. Discuss both opinions and give your opinion

#people #teenagers #believe #challenge
It is apparent that old people always say
they believe whether
Suggestion
whether they believe
 it isn'
t
 having a scientific
research
 to confirm that it is accurate.
Although
, some believe of the
ancester
someone from whom you are descended (but usually more remote than a grandparent)
ancestors
ancestor
 are useful for our daily life.
However
, many teenagers don'
t
 believe in what their
ancester
someone from whom you are descended (but usually more remote than a grandparent)
ancestors
 believe and want to
proof
 it. From my point of view, I think that some of believes is true, but some are not, described in the following paragraph. Many believe can be
proof
Suggestion
proofed
 by scientific experiment and
research
 that those are myths.
For example
, the elder in Thailand believes that thunder comes from the giant throw a weapon to the angel. Though, nowadays we can
proof
 it with scientific
research
 about light and electric reaction.
On the contrary
, the juvenile mostly trusts the things that could be
proof
 of the science. Thereby, sometime they don'
t
 believe in god, region, heaven, etc.
In addition
, some believe is true and could be
proof
 of the scientific process, but the way that the
ancester
someone from whom you are descended (but usually more remote than a grandparent)
ancestor
ancestors
ancestry
 tell their
next
 generation is in a kind of story telling. Thereby, the listener think that it is a lullaby story,
such
 as Thai old people says that if you sitting on the table you couldn'
t
 be the smart person. Though, the reason is they want their children sit properly on the chair to less the opportunities of the accident. To conclude, There are a lot of beliefs that are true, but there are
also
 many beliefs that are false. We should concern and
research
 more about them. Some strange believe is true, but in the way of story telling they are many feelings and opinion on it.
Therefore
, the adolescence should not be challenged with their
ancester
someone from whom you are descended (but usually more remote than a grandparent)
ancestors
ancestor
ancestry
 believes. In my opinion, we could trust some believes with scientific
proof
.
Submitted by phunisa.kun on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: