IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

It is often thought that the increase in juvenile crime can be attributed to violence in the media. What do you think is the reason for the growth in the rate of juvenile crime? What solutions can you offer to deal with this situation

#crime #violence #media #reason #growth #rate #offer #situation
In the contemporary era, it is considered by many people that the high rate of juvenile delinquency is linked with the aggression displayed by the media through movies. The biggest factor is media, but there are some other factors
also
 there which contribute to the increase of crimes.
This
 essay will discuss the reasons and some solution in order to mitigate
this
 problem in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
 with, the media are the most influential factor which impact badly on the youth. Most of youngsters prefer to watch movies and they see heroes are violent and awarded in the movies. They become their role models and they tried to follow them and imitate them. It impacts aggressively on the behaviour of the youngsters. They believed that It makes them cool if they carry some weapons and resolve some problems with aggression. To cite an example, a recent survey showed that 80% percent of crimes were committed by the youth due to the influence of movies and aggression portrayed in it.
Thus
, movies have a great role in order to engage them in crimes.
However
, some steps should be taken in order to reduce juvenile delinquency.
Firstly
, the government should provide facility of rehabilitation programs by which youngsters can consult with a psychologist and which help them to come up with violent thoughts.
Furthermore
, parents should supervise them and teach them what is wrong and right for them along with the consequences of the criminal activities.
Also
, authorities should implement some strict rules and penalties on the criminal activities. So that, they may scare before trying any criminal activities.
Thus
, these measures definitely help to reduce the crime rate. To recapitulate,
although
 the percentage of juvenile crime is increasing with the passage of time, but some steps are
also
 there which help to overcome the crimes by youngsters.
Submitted by poojamanjindersingh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: