IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

More and more students at university today are not choosing to study science. Why is this happening? What are the effects of this?

#students #university #study #science #effects
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Beyond doubt,
science
Use synonyms
 is considered as a one of crucial subjects at
high education place
Suggestion
the higher education place
higher education place
.
However
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, some students are
willing take
Accept comma addition
willing, take
this
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 subject from school curriculum due to reasons. And I do believe that there are several factors influencing and would be discussed above. On the one hand, there are a few reasons for
this
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 statement.
Firstly
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, in our modern society we are highly recommended to choose not only well
paid but
Accept comma addition
paid, but
also
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 modest, highly demanded and appreciated jobs that helps us to build up
strong and reliable career
Suggestion
a strong and reliable career
 in labour market by do not
getting
Suggestion
get
 educated about
science
Use synonyms
.
In addition
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 to
this
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, as we all know
science
Use synonyms
 subject included astronomy, biology and others which is hard to learn and concentrate on, so
our
plural of "I"
we
 offsprings do not have patient to get
updated
Suggestion
updates
 about
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this subjects
Suggestion
this subject
these subjects
.
On the other hand
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,
Accept space
,
there will be consequent effects that should be taken into account.
Initially
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, by do not
learning
Suggestion
learn
this
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 essential
subjects
Suggestion
subject
 our young generation becomes illiterate,
consequently
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 they have no idea what to say when are asked about those subjects.
Additionally
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,
this
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 can cause lost
of
Suggestion
on
this
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subjects
Suggestion
subject
 and would become
rare which
Accept comma addition
rare, which
 means no one is literate about
this
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 and we are expected to witness dying out of
employees
Suggestion
the employees
 of
this
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subjects
Suggestion
subject
. To sum up, have evaluated of both aspects I am of the opinion that, the
science
Use synonyms
 and included subjects had better to be educated in university and I believe
this
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subjects
Suggestion
subject
 can come in handy in certain occasions in their life,
otherwise
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 we are predicted to face with serious problems mentioned above.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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