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Band 5.5

Nowadays, people are spending more time away from their homes because they spend longer in their workplace. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

#people #time #homes #workplace
At present, people are passing additional
time
 in their organization rather than their residence due to the huge
work
 pressure.
This
 essay will examine the advantages and disadvantages of spending a longer
time
 in the workroom
instead
 of their home and provide a logical conclusion. The two main advantages of expending extra
time
 in offices are a guarantee of learning new methods of
work
 and open up different career opportunities.
Firstly
, many companies have several kinds of training method which helps people to pursue
work especially
Accept comma addition
work, especially
 to keep pace with the times. As a consequence, people are being more intellectual and
informative
Suggestion
informed
 through these training systems.
Secondly
, spending extra
time
 in the workplace can promote people through their hard
work
, and institution offers new designation according to their company rules.
For example
, a survey conducted by
monster
Suggestion
a monster
monsters
the monster
.
com a renowned international company found
Suggestion
Can a renowned international company find
Can a renowned international company found
Com a renowned international company found
 that every year around 10% people receive promotion into their branches in different countries because of putting extra effort.
However
, occupying in workplaces
also
 have some major disadvantages like getting distance from family and suffering from mental stress. The main disadvantage associated with residing a long
time
 in the offices is people making detachment from their
family especially
Accept comma addition
family, especially
 parents spend less
time
 with their
children which
Accept comma addition
children, which
 causes
negative effect
Suggestion
a negative effect
 on children as well as many parents have no idea how their children spend their
time
. Another disadvantage is that when excessive mental stress comes to a person’s body or brain, he/she cannot handle
this
 pressure, thereby various health hazard problems appear
such
 as high blood pressure, cardiac arrest, stroke and so on. A prime example of
this
 is that every year in Bangladesh 5% of patients admit hospital because of these diseases where the trigger point is unbearable mental stress. In conclusion,
although
 go through a long
time
with
Suggestion
to
work
 in the office has certain advantages like getting knowledge about the advanced method and receiving career pathways, but it has an extremely negative impact on the family as well as health.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • career progression
  • earning potential
  • enhanced productivity
  • skill sets
  • work-life balance
  • personal well-being
  • negatively impacting
  • increased stress
  • health issues
  • burnout
  • cardiovascular diseases
What to do next:
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