Multicultural societies, where people of different ethnic groups live together can bring more benefits than drawbacks to a society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is surprising to signify the growth of

multiculturism

the doctrine that several different cultures (rather than one national culture) can coexist peacefully and equitably in a single country

multiculturalism

expanding in different parts of the world. Nowadays, different ethnic groups enjoy living together as a society and thereby facilitate more benefits. In my opinion, I strongly believe that the advantages regarding the multicultural societies would

outwiegh

be heavier than

outweigh

the perils. It would help in bringing up a unique and cooperating generation as well as reduce conflicts based on discrimination.

Firstly

, it would urge the upcoming generation to be a symbol of cooperation.

Moreover

, it would create a sense of happiness around the world. Cooperation would lead to advancement in both

technological

Suggestion

technology

and national aspects.

This

would

inturn

Suggestion

in turn

increase the income and living status of different ethnic groups in the society.

Moreover

, it would help decrease the amount of national conflicts.

For example

, the

first

female collector of Uttarpradesh was a backward class

women

Suggestion

woman

, who has taken a step forward to bring more

benifits

financial assistance in time of need

benefits

to the

economical

Suggestion

economic

development in India.

Additionally

, it would be a significant reason for reducing the feeling of dilemma for different ethnic groups on discrimination. Earlier, a certain group of people

were considered

Suggestion

was considered

to be discriminated from the others, resulting in verbal harassment and even a serious crime like killing. Various laws

has been introduced

Suggestion

have been introduced

to drop

this

point of view.

For instance

, in India

Accept space

the SC's, ST's and OBC's are given equal representation in politics as well as society related issues.

Oppurtunities

Suggestion

Opportunities

to vote have been their greatest achievements of all

beacuse

for the reason that; on account of

because

, earlier they were denied the right to vote. To conclude, people should curb

thier

of them or themselves

their

mentality and have a

sensation

Suggestion

sense

of unity. It would bring more benefits than drawbacks because, the more

united we

Accept comma addition

united, we

stay, the more we are strong.

Submitted by vinu_vmv on Sun May 24 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast food. Many people think that it is good to eat traditional foods while others believe that fast food is a good choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is often argued that people tend to prefer international junk foods rather than their native cuisines; but the opponents say that traditional foods have always been a smart choice for their daily meals. In this essay, I will elaborate on both views and demonstrate my opinion.
6
band
You are due to start a new job next week but you will not be able to because you have some problems. Write a letter to your new employer. In your letter • explain your situation • describe your problems • tell him/her when you think you can start. You should write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write your own address. Begin your letter as follows: Dear ...............,
I am writing this letter regarding my new job that is going to start next week. But, because of some family emergency I will not be able to join from the scheduled date.
6.5
band
Some people opine that increasing office hour is a reason for many social and personal problems and that is why it should be reduced to 35 hours in a week. What are the advantages and disadvantages of reducing the working week to 35 hours?
Increased work hours have an impact on societal and individual life, with generally negative consequences. This problem motivates people to reduce workplace hours to 35 hours per week. This essay will attempt to identify the positives and negatives of declining office hours.
4.5
band
Nowadays young people are admiring media and sports stars, even though they do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Young people are admired famous media and sport celebrities now. some of them might be misguided by the bad example. In my opinion, I suppose it is not a good development.
4.5
band
Some people think that public libraries are no longer necessary, while others believe that public libraries still perform useful functions.Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Throughuot wolrd there is a debate that do we actually need libraries or not. Some of them think that it is not useful to keep libraries ,whereas others, including me, believe that they still remain its pontencial for help human kind.

Multicultural societies, where people of different ethnic groups live together can bring more benefits than drawbacks to a society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast food. Many people think that it is good to eat traditional foods while others believe that fast food is a good choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people opine that increasing office hour is a reason for many social and personal problems and that is why it should be reduced to 35 hours in a week. What are the advantages and disadvantages of reducing the working week to 35 hours?

Nowadays young people are admiring media and sports stars, even though they do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that public libraries are no longer necessary, while others believe that public libraries still perform useful functions.Discuss both views and give your opinion.