The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The pie charts illustrate how
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
British
students
Use synonyms
were able to speak other languages
as well as
Linking Words
English at one university between 2000 and 2010. What stands out from the graph
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
proportion
Correct article usage
the proportion
show examples
of
students
Use synonyms
able to speak Spanish only and another language
in addition
Linking Words
to English experienced
a
Change the article
an
show examples
increase from 2000 to 2010,
whereas
Linking Words
the percentage of no French only witnessed a decrease during
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
period.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
proportion
Add an article
the proportion
show examples
of
German only
Add a hyphen
German-only
show examples
spoken remained stable. As can be seen from the graph, the rate of British
students
Use synonyms
Correct pronoun usage
who spoken
show examples
spoken
Wrong verb form
spoke
show examples
Spanish only
both
Change preposition
in both
show examples
2000 and 2010 come top ranking with 30% and 35% respectively.
In addition
Linking Words
, the rate of
students
Use synonyms
able to speak another language register a slow rise,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
made up from 15% to 20%.
However
Linking Words
,
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
of French only spoken started at 15% and
then
Linking Words
drop
sligtly
Correct your spelling
slightly
by 10%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
proportion of
students
Use synonyms
able to speak German only remain
contant
Correct your spelling
constant
content
at 10%
during
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
from 2000 to 2010.
Submitted by MERVE DEMİR on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words students with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportions
  • British students
  • university
  • speaking other languages
  • language proficiency
  • overall trends
  • comparison
  • 2000
  • 2010
  • chart
  • data
  • percentage
  • significant
  • increase
  • decrease
  • noteworthy
  • comparative analysis
  • improvement
  • decline
  • conclusion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: