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Band 4.5

the charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did no go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.

the charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did no go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.
#show #uk #graduate #students #go #work #college #summaries #information #features #comparisons #relevent
This
 bar
chat
Correct your spelling
chart
show examples
 is showing UK graduate and postgraduate
students
 who did not do
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
work
 and what did they do after leaving
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
college in 2008.
To sum up
, all data
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 report
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 postgraduate and graduate
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
work
 activity after college is given below. in the first bar chart
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 aim of graduate
students
 after
collefe
Correct your spelling
college
 in 2008. 17735
students
 were done
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
 jobs. 3500
students
 were done
valuntary
Correct your spelling
voluntary
work
 and 29665
students
 done future study, In
last
 16235
students
 were unemployed.
Students
 who continued their future studies were higher in quantity.
Numbers
Correct article usage
The numbers
show examples
 of
Part
Add a hyphen
Part-time
show examples
time
work
students
 were lower
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
those student
Change the determiner
that student
those students
show examples
 who continued their future studies. The rank of unemployed student
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 less than
Correct pronoun usage
that from
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
those student
Change the determiner
that student
those students
show examples
 who did
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
jobes
Correct your spelling
jobs
show examples
. The number of
students
 who did voluntary
work
 was quite low. the number of postgraduate
students
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2008 (deducting full-
time
work
) almost 3000 were in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
. The
students
 who
cuntinued
Correct your spelling
continued
continue
 their
further
sutdies
Correct your spelling
studies
 were 2725. The
students
 who did
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
 jobs were 2535, which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 less than
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
those
students
 who continued their
further
sutdies
Correct your spelling
studies
.
Moreover
, 1625
students
 were
unemploued
Correct your spelling
unemployed
. In the end, the
students
 who did voluntary
work
 were just 345
Submitted by jackob on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words students, time, work, part with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 3 times.
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