nowadays children watch a lot of tv and play video games. however, some people think that it is not good for a child's mental health. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

#children #tv #video #games #people #child #health

There are lots of differences between life of

90's kids

Suggestion

the 90's kids

and kids of

21st century

Suggestion

the 21st century

. Nowadays, most children spent their childhood playing video games and keeping an eye on

television

Suggestion

the television

. One school of thought is that doing so may leads to severe mental health issues, with which I partially disagree as there are numerous benefits too.

First

of all

Accept space

there are so many reasons which will prove

such

activities innocent. There

are

Suggestion

ample amount of brain games available to

play which

Accept comma addition

play, which

requires great concentration, focus and intelligence. Playing

such

games on regular

bases

a relation that provides the foundation for something

basis

will definitely enhance cerebral capabilities which will make kids smarter and mentally sharp.

Secondly

, watching various knowledge shows and programs on television

also

possess

positive impact

Suggestion

a positive impact

children's mind

Suggestion

the child's mind

child's mind

a child's mind

. By doing so

Accept space

they will unlock their hidden talents by learning new skills and things. They will acquire information out of

box

Suggestion

the box

which will help them out to decide their future path. Ultimately, they will be mentally happy and satisfied. But it should be in limits as every coin has two sides

Accept space

there are several drawbacks of doing these activities beyond certain boundaries. By playing

violent type

Suggestion

the violent type

a violent type

of games and watching

such

content on television may make them aggressive and short tempered that may

leads

Suggestion

lead

them in a valley of depression

Accept space

anxiety and psychological problems. If we Look up and figure out all pros and cons carefully, it

will leads

Suggestion

will lead

conclusion

Suggestion

the conclusion

a conclusion

that benefits of playing video games and watching TV outweigh risks.

Submitted by divy patel on Wed Jun 03 2020

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Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

242 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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nowadays children watch a lot of tv and play video games. however, some people think that it is not good for a child's mental health. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Robots and artificial intelligence are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive or negative impact on society?

In some countries children take up paid jobs during the summer vacation. Some people feel that this amounts to child labour. Others argue that summer jobs help children learn valuable lessons. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Advertising is all around us; it is an unavoidable part of everyone’ life. Some people say that advertising is a positive part of our lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?/

Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?