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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that playing computer games is bad for children in every way. Others say that playing computer games can have positive effects on the way children develop. Discuss both view sides and give your opinion

#people #computer #games #children #effects
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The
computer
Use synonyms
 game industry has an intrinsic role in our daily life.
This
Linking Words
 enormous increase
has lead
Suggestion
has led
 to two opposite opinions on the effects of playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games on children. A certain people claim that
computer
Use synonyms
 games are detrimental to the youngsters’ health being while a few thinks it has some positive impacts on the child’s growth. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will shed
lights
Suggestion
light
 on these
boons
a percussion instrument consisting of a pair of hollow pieces of wood or bone (usually held between the thumb and fingers) that are made to click together (as by Spanish dancers) in rhythm with the dance
bones
 as well as
analyze
consider in detail and subject to an analysis in order to discover essential features or meaning
analyse
 the negative aspects of playing games in front of
computer
Use synonyms
 screens.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the most notable advantages of playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games is skills improvement. Playing
computer
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 games help
enrich
Suggestion
enriches
 the young generation’s reflexion and logical thinking by providing practise in problem solving and tactical situations.
In addition
Linking Words
, the juvenile
are
Suggestion
is
 able to meet and strike up a friendship with like minded people and share ideas with them. Despite those benefits, spending a great amount of
time
Use synonyms
 playing games will face climbing rate of deleterious health issues; including obesity, heart diseases and so on. With their leisure
Use synonyms
time mostly
Accept comma addition
time, mostly
 spend on playing games in front of
computer
Use synonyms
 screens, the youngsters will lack sufficient physical activities;
this
Linking Words
 lifestyle tendency absolutely cause
gaining
Suggestion
gain
 weight.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, violent contents
in
Suggestion
of
computer
Use synonyms
 games could have egregious impacts on children’s behaviour since the young people would imitate the ferocious acts in the games In conclusion, no doubt there are some pros involved in playing video games.
However
Linking Words
, parents should limit the playing
time
Use synonyms
 and take a proper care to overcome
such
Linking Words
 issues so that children can enjoy their leisure
time
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by hien nguyen on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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