working hours today are too long and people are not spending as much time as they should with their families or on leisure activities. What is our opinion on this?

Nowadays, people are working for long hours and they don’t find time as they should with their families or on other leisure activities. Being mentally healthy is definite and difficult to make it possible when people work for long hours. There is an absolute need
on
Suggestion
for
entertainment to live a stress less
life
.
This
essay will discuss on why working hours should be reduced. Working long hours affects the mental health of people because working without
break
Suggestion
a break
for the brain should cause exhaustion to
individuals
Suggestion
individual
state. Research says employees who work for long hours are affected with various physical and psychological issues.
For example
,
Accept space
,
people working in IT sectors are influenced by agitation, depression, anxiety disorders, aggression and insomnia.
In addition
working long hours doesn’t let people
to think
Suggestion
think
about the ways to get rid out of job stress. For these reasons, long working hours should be reduced
for
Suggestion
to
a mentally healthy
life
. In regard to live a stress less
life entertainment
Accept comma addition
life, entertainment
plays a vital role. Entertainment relaxes the brain and makes it calm for a while. It ceases the past
,
Accept space
,
makes us to live the present and prepares
onself
reflexive form of "one"
oneself
for the future. It produces an enthusiastic energy within
self
Suggestion
the self
.
Accept space
.
For example
, there are four members in our family. All four of us are professionals.
we
Suggestion
We
are stuck with our stuffs all the time
.
Accept space
.
However
, at the end of the day we find time to talk to each other, share our thoughts
,
Accept space
,
feelings and all the flavours that we experienced on the day. We motivate each other and prepare ourselves mentally to meet the
further
challenges. Even though, people work for long hours, they should try to balance it properly
.
Accept space
.
Therefore
,
instead
of having a difficult cycle, it is good to reduce working
hours which
Accept comma addition
hours, which
contributes for physically and psychologically healthy
life
.
Submitted by rachel on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: