The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing? Do you agree or disagree?

#growth #shops #towns #cities

We are

live

Suggestion

living

in the

internet

time and the

internet

help the companies to

growth

Suggestion

grow

their sales. Which means that they can sale their products around the world. I agree and I think

this

event impact of their decision to use online shops

instead

of shops in the cities. The progress of online shopping impact on the

people

Suggestion

person's

life

and they can have a better

life

First

of all, Today the issue of traffic jams is the biggest problem in the cities. Which means that most people use own car on the shopping way. So they waste many hours on the way and in a traffic

jams

Suggestion

jam

and they can not to save their

life

Secondly

, people can find

more good

Suggestion

better

offers

Suggestion

the online shops. On the

internet

the online shops have a lot of visitors.

Although

people can find many online shops on the

internet

, so the online shops usually sell their products with off and it’s so beneficial for people.

On the other hand

, the online

shops it's

Accept comma addition

shops, it's

not enough for many people to use

instead

of shop in the cities.

First

of all, many people prefer to buy some expensive things

Suggestion

the stores in the cities. Because they can not trust online shops. And making trust

for

Suggestion

people on the websites is a hardship. Which means that they are virtual shops.

Secondly

, for some industry like fashion people prefer to wear clothes and shoes in the stores

instead

of they guess the clothes are

fit

Suggestion

fitted

fitting

in their body. Especially the

womens

an adult female person (as opposed to a man)

women

women's

are keen about the sizes of their clothes so they prefer to buy in physical stores. In conclusion, the online shops are growing and they provide

better

Suggestion

a better life

life

for people and I

can not

cannot

agree more about that. But, many people especially

womens are

Accept comma addition

women, are

women are

prefer

Suggestion

preferred

to have

chance

Suggestion

a chance

the chance

to try and touch products in the shops.

Submitted by Parham Zare on Tue Jul 07 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

312 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

e-commerce
brick-and-mortar
physical stores
online retailers
retail apocalypse
digital economy
consumer behavior
sustainability
commercial landscape
high-street
consumer trends
augmented reality
showrooms
carbon footprint

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The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing? Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Nowadays, a lot of offices employ open-space designs instead of separate rooms for work. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

The number of children that read for fun has dropped dramatically in recent years. What are the reasons for this? How can we encourage children to read more?