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Band 4.5

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

#minutes #people #person #opportunity
There is no doubt that rich people have the ability to
provided
Suggestion
provide
 many opportunities to people from different backgrounds. In my opinion, I agree that
wealth
Suggestion
wealthy
wealthiest
wealthier
 people could help other people of various backgrounds, which is believed to be
complementary role
Suggestion
a complementary role
 of high class people toward their people. A good reason why is the rich could help the others is that money always is considered to be the power.
For instance
, people from a high class group have the ability to create more jobs,
consequently
, the figures of un-
employee
Suggestion
employed
 persons would fall and
hence
, the crime numbers would drop. Another point to consider is that many wealthy families could
aid
make an addition (to); join or combine or unite with others; increase the quality, quantity, size or scope of
add
 some by providing their money to some charities.
This
 would help volunteering persons to
provided
Suggestion
provide
 the basic needs
such
 as treatment for a sick person, particularly in the developing countries.
Finally
, a man from a rich family could benefit society, which in turn would help a country and its
economic
Suggestion
economy
 as a whole, particularly those with financial strains.
In other words
, the rich people can help in funding a health care system and education for their communities.
This
 would improve the society's health and produce more
knowledgable
highly educated; having extensive information or understanding
knowledgeable
 persons and,
therefore
, more productive community.
As a result
this
 would be reflected on a county's economic and leadership in various fields. In conclusion, many opportunities are
affordable
Suggestion
afforded
 to many societies with
help
Suggestion
the help
 of rich people.
Moreover
, their role is priceless and the money that they spend would be recouped over with the values it
is bring
Suggestion
has brought
is brought
brings
.
Submitted by Ali Alzaher on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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