It is better to be a member of a group than to be the leader of a group. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

#member #group #leader

The pie charts convey substance is the change in units that electricity production by fuel source between Australia and France in 1980 and 2000. We

illustrates

Suggestion

illustrate

have illustrated

are illustrating

the data of Australia

firstly

. For one thing, the proportion of coal

is increase

Suggestion

has increased

increases

dramatically from 50 in 1980 to 130 in 2000. And

then

, the percentage of Hydro

power

is slender enhance

Suggestion

is slender enhancing

is slender enhanced

has slender enhanced

enhances slender

is slender enhance

from 20 to 36 during two decades.

In addition

, there is a slight decline between 10 to 2 from 1980 to 2000 in oil.

Last

but not least, there are all significantly reduce from 20 to 2 and 0 in Natural Gas and Nuclear

power

respectively. And show the change of France's information.

First

of all, the ratio of coal

is maintain

Suggestion

has maintained

is maintained

maintains

stable of 25 between

two decades

Suggestion

the two decades

. And

then

, the proportion of oil

is gradually increase

Suggestion

has gradually increased

gradually increases

from 20 in 1980 to 25 in 2000. After that, the Natural gas is a substantial

reduce

Suggestion

reduction

from 25 to 2. And the rate of Nuclear

power

is a remarkable enhance between 15 to 126.

Finally

, the ratio of Hydro

is almost keep

Suggestion

has almost kept

is almost kept

stable from 5 to 2. In summary, the productions of Australia are all improved apart from Hydro

power

. Especially in coal. And the trend of productive proportion is influencing in France.

Submitted by ling02 on Wed Jul 15 2020

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

210 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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