You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and look after their six- year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter: – Explain why you would like the job – give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ – say how you would spend your free time while you are in Australia

#advertisement #australian #magazine #someone #six #months #six- #child #parents #job #person #time #australia

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing with regard to a job opportunity advertised in a magazine from Australia. My name is Danubia Juliao and I would love to be considered for

this

opportunity.

First

and foremost, I have been working as an English teacher in Brazil for the

last

5 years. All my students are between 5 and 7 years old, which shows you how comfortable and experienced I am with small kids.

Furthermore

, I am a great person for

this

job because I am a proactive individual who is

detail oriented

Add a hyphen

detail-oriented

show examples

. Those are crucial characteristics when comes to take care of children. During my whole career, I have been known for my dedication and professionalism, which already brought me many awards. Those you can see

Correct pronoun usage

those in

show examples

the document attached. As I am always eager to learn and improve my abilities, I was already planning to expand my knowledge and career in your country.

As a result

, I have already planned to stay there for at least one year to acquire my post-graduation certificate in one of the best colleges in your country.

Then

this

would be an opportunity for me to gain more knowledge as well as for your family, who will have an experienced professional to take care of your loved one. During my days off I would be studying, attending networking events to learn more about the education industry, as well as enjoying the tourist attractions. I am looking forward to hearing from you soon. Thank you for reading my letter and for your consideration. Yours sincerely, Danubia Juliao

Submitted by danubiajuliao on Sat Jul 18 2020

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The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

Dear + name
Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

9 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

advertisement
live with
look after
six-year-old child
suitable
employ
free time
Australia

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The Greeting

People who damage public property, such as buildings or statues should be required to do community service (such as cleaning parks) as a punishment rather than other forms of punishment (such as paying a fine or going to prison). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

the best way to make roads safer is to mske vehicle drivers pass exam each year, RTio what extent do you agre or disagree?

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

The world is experiencing a dramatic increase in population. This is causing problems not only for poor, undeveloped countries, but also for industrialized and developing nations. Describe some of the problems that overpopulation causes, and suggestion least one possible solution.