IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The world of work is radidly changing and employees cannot depend on having the same job or the same working conditions for life. Why is it the case? Can you suggest some ways to prepare people to work in the future?

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In the 21st century, the speedy growth and advances in automation are contributing to an inevitable consequence that the demands of employment are constantly changing,
therefore
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, workers shouldn’t
contingent
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be contingent
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 on a steady job or consistent working qualities anymore.
This
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 essay will discuss some reasons behind
this
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 tendency and propose some recommendations on crucial things people need to supply themselves to engage in the career market. The most influential motivation for
such
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 changes is the introduction of new machinery.
For example
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, many available jobs
such
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 as bank tellers, accountants, and bricklayers are predicted to be replaced by hi-tech machines and artificial intelligence within 5 years.
In addition
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, the ever-increasing desire to cut expenses and raise profits of various enterprises results in an unfavourable situation that many
staffs
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staff
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 have to face with
the
Correct article usage
apply
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lower
wage
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wages
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 or even lose their jobs.
However
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, there are a number of ways people can prepare
for
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apply
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themselves to deal with
this
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 mechanization trend more
efficient
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efficiently
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.
Firstly
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, those students who just graduated from high school should be provided with orientation programs about distinctive occupations/ vocational courses to make a more suitable and precise decision
of
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in
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 choosing their career path.
Secondly
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, it is extremely important to continually update the latest information about technology, be computer literate, and
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also
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apply
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cultivate more skills
besides
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 the conventional ones to adapt to the modern working environment
easier
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more easily
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.
For example
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, the incorporation of technology into a car manufacturer’s process has created autonomous vehicles that there is no longer a need for drivers. In conclusion,
although
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 there are many innovations in workplaces today, educating people to have sufficient preparation and
qualification
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qualifications
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 to keep up to date with contemporary technology is an essential factor
to avoid
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in avoiding
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 major problems in the future.

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task response
Ensure to address all parts of the essay prompt completely and explicitly. Provide detailed explanations and evidence for each point.
coherence and cohesion
The essay structure is clear and well-organized. Ensure a stronger introduction and conclusion that summarize the main points and provide a more definitive resolution.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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