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Band 2

Writing Task 2: As a result of electronic inventions such as the computer and television, people do less physical activity, and this is having a negative effect on their health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#inventions #computer #television #people #activity #effect #health
The bar graph gives information on children were using modes of
transport
 for to
travel
 and from
school
 in on
country
Suggestion
the country
 in 1990 and 2010. Children ages between 5 and 12 and they were using modes of
transport
 were by
car
, by bus, cycling, walking, walking and bus. Overall, the graph
represent
Suggestion
represents
 to famous mode of
transport
 was walking in 1990 and
car
 passenger in 2010, while the lowest preferred
transport
were
In or at or to what place
where
car
 passenger in 1990 and cycling in 2010 by children who
travel
 to and from
school
. In 1990, walking were most famous modes of
transport
, approximately 12 millions in per years.While,
car
 passenger were lowest prefer by children for to
travel
 and from
school
. In 1990, cycling and walking-bus's millions was nearly, approximately 5.5
millions
Suggestion
million
 in per year. The modes of
transport
 balance of values have been changed between 1990 and 2010.
Car
 passengers sharply increased
,
Accept space
,
4
millions
Suggestion
million
 to 11
millions
Suggestion
million
, who prefer to
walking
Suggestion
walk
be walking
be walked
for
being one more than three
four
 to
travel
 or from
school
, it rapidly decreased between 1990 and 2010.
However
, in
this
 country bus has been stable changed.
Additionally
, cycling and walking-bus
have
Suggestion
has
nearly total number
Suggestion
a nearly total number
 both of two different
period
Suggestion
periods
.
Submitted by baykalmeliksah on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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