Nowadays, experience is more valued in the workplace than knowledge in many countries. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

These days, skills and professionalism are favoured at

workplace

Suggestion

the workplace

. While other people's perspectives are that education is crucial for many countries. I personally believe that the benefits will absolutely outweigh the drawbacks. They both

depends

Suggestion

depend

on the company, whether they valued education or skills. The main benefit is that having experiences

also takes

Suggestion

also take

a major part of having the opportunity to get into a company.

For example

, most workplaces will choose those who have had

work

with others and have skills

such

as volunteering at an event.

This

can help them find their specific future prospects.

On the other hand

this

might affect the students who

work

hard for their school mentally. Some might not have time for participating

Suggestion

any event.

This

can make them feel

discourage

Suggestion

discouraged

. In conclusion, there are advantages and disadvantages with valuing between experience and knowledge at workplaces. In my opinion, skills are vital for

work

, it prepares you for what you will face when you

work

with others.

Submitted by Sodanet Ngov on Tue Jul 28 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

164 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

valued
workplace
advantages
disadvantages
experience
knowledge
mentor
colleagues
innovation
stagnation
traditional methods
recent graduates
theoretical knowledge
diversity
viewpoints
proven ability
stability
industries
technology
adaptation

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Nowadays, experience is more valued in the workplace than knowledge in many countries. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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