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Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, people are spending more time in their workplace. Why is this? Is this a negative or positive development?

#countries #people #time #workplace #development
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More and more employees are
find
Suggestion
finding
 themselves working long hours these days.
This
Linking Words
 is
cheifly
for the most part
chiefly
 due to the evolving nature of
work
Use synonyms
 in the 21st
centurary
Suggestion
 and its decidedly not a positive change. Younger generation today cannot expect to
work
Use synonyms
 a traditional 9 to 5
job
Suggestion
jobs
 and receive a good compensations. In the past, a person collected
majority
Suggestion
the majority
a majority
 of their income from salary and was able to afford a car, a home and a stable family life. Nowadays, salaries are lower compared to the living expenses, many jobs have disappeared as technology improves and companies become more
effiecent
being effective without wasting time or effort or expense
efficient
.
This
Linking Words
 means that an average worker will have to
work
Use synonyms
 for longer hours or get a
second
Linking Words
 job to strive for the same standard of living they remember from childhood.
Hence
Linking Words
its
it is
it's
 no surprise that many are discontent with their
work
Use synonyms
-life balance.
This
Linking Words
 is typically a negative development because it leads to mental health problems. The exception is when an individual has a passion for their job,
such
Linking Words
 cases are few and far between.
Linking Words
Instead most
Accept comma addition
Instead, most
 must accept jobs they do not love with lower salaries. Working long hours
,
Accept space
,
 making little money, and not having passion for
work
Use synonyms
 can result in
formation
Suggestion
the formation
 of an unhealthy mental state.
This
Linking Words
 varies from mild unhappiness, apathy and mild restlessness to extreme manifestations
such
Linking Words
 as depressions and panic attacks. Many people today have begun self medicating with alcohol or drugs or turning to a therapist who prescribes mood-altering pharmaceuticals to address the symptoms rooted in large scale societal problems. In conclusion, many people
work
Use synonyms
 longer hours because of lower salaries and increased cost of living and worsens their mental health.
Its
Suggestion
It's
 important for individuals today to cut back of their living expenses and lead a happy life with less money.
Submitted by anilkarayilcan on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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