Some people believe that violance on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society.other deny that these factors have any significant influence on peoples' behaviour.What is your opinion.

Most of the
society
have
Suggestion
has
a belief that
violance
an act of aggression (as one against a person who resists)
violence
on
television
shows and in
computer
games bring ruinous affect to the
society
.Some neglect these aspects are not being reasons for the peoples' deportment.As my opinion
,
Accept space
,
I believe that violation on
television
and in
computer
games could be badly
effected
acted upon; influenced
affected
for humans' life style. On one hand
,
Accept space
,
discussing regarding
brutality
on the
television
and
computer
games are not
crutial
of extreme importance; vital to the resolution of a crisis
crucial
to the
individuals
Suggestion
individual's
individual
life until people copy them.
For
instance shooting
Accept comma addition
instance, shooting
,
Accept space
,
killing people
,
Accept space
,
drug
smuglers
someone who imports or exports without paying duties
smugglers
smuggler
can be seen in video games.But as a human being we should
tactfull
having or showing a sense of what is fitting and considerate in dealing with others
tactful
tasteful
to make sense that they are not
pratical
concerned with actual use or practice
practical
.
On the other hand
,
Accept space
,
many
bilieve
accept as true; take to be true
believe
believed
believes
that
brutality
on
television
is the greatest influence for repeat them in the
society
.
Furthermore
,
Accept space
,
some people who are used to
watch
Suggestion
watching
teledramas
and movies as their routine habit.It will automatically become them to the movie
lifestyle
Accept comma addition
lifestyle, such
such
as harming family members
,
Accept space
,
stealing money
,
Accept space
,
instantly make angry themselves.In
additionally
,
Accept space
,
brutality
on video games
also
an influence to the
society
as same as
television
.It could be ruined kids' mind easier than the
television
.
because
Suggestion
Because
they have been made especially for kids to get their attraction.Kids will absolutely try to follow what
thay
people in general
they
can see within video games. In conclusion
,
Accept space
,
though some
bilieve
accept as true; take to be true
believe
that the
brutality
on
television
and in the
computer
games don't affect to the
society
.I believe that they can make
humongous threat
Suggestion
the humongous threat
humongous threats
a humongous threat
in the community.
However
,
Accept space
,
this
can be a disaster to the present growing youth and future generation.
Submitted by gayan1990227 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: