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Band 4.5

The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last 10 years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#percentage #children #society #years #effects #trend
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In recent times, the topic of children having excess weight compared to their age has been widely
reportedly
Suggestion
reported
reports
report
 published from the countries of
western world
Suggestion
the western world
.
This
 essay will discuss how the growth of fast
food
 chains and lack of physical activities in
school curriculum
Suggestion
the school curriculum
school curricula
 has led to unhealthy eating habits and obesity in children. The main problem of teenagers and kids gaining excess weight these days is growth of fast
food
 chains. Generally, the
food
 served in these restaurants or pick-up points is not properly baked or cooked and the nutritional value is not measured for the ingredients used to make it.
For instance
, the burgers and fries served at
drive-through
Suggestion
the drive-through
 of these
food
 joints are not cooked properly because of lack of time.
This
 has resulted in children inculcating unhealthy eating habits just to satisfy their taste buds and not caring about the
health
Suggestion
healthiest
 diet required to maintain the body. The other problem is lack of physical and sports activities in the curriculum of educational institutions in the name of marketing academic results of students.
This
 pressure of scoring high marks becomes an obstacle for students in opting for sports activities. To cite an example, institutions display and share result of students on every portal available, but they rarely share the student's profile who has achieved name in sports.
This
 has resulted in children opting a sedentary lifestyle restricted only to
studies
Suggestion
study
 and outshine other academically. In conclusion, the growth of fast
food
 joints exaggerating the bad eating habits and diminishing outdoor activities in the academic
institutions leading
Accept comma addition
institutions, leading
 to the obesity in students can be factored for
increasing number
Suggestion
the increasing number
an increasing number
 of overweight kids in
developed
Suggestion
developing
 world in the past decade.
Submitted by welcome123 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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