Children today are too dependent on computers and electronic entertainment. It would be better to encourage them to spend more time outside playing sports and games. Do you agree or disagree?

Electronic gadgets like computer and video games are becoming much popular that children nowadays usually spend most of their
time
on them. It is believed that
instead
of spending all the
time
on the electronic devices by the young ones they must
be boost
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be boosted
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up to spend
f
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a
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ew hours on outdoor activities. I strongly agree
wiht
Correct your spelling
with
the notion and would like to elaborate my views in the below paragraphs.
To begin
with, due to advancement in
the
Remove the article
apply
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technology like computers and smartphones, people are becoming more dependent on them
specially
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especially
show examples
children.
Allthough
Correct your spelling
Although
, these devices have
n
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a
the
show examples
umber of advantages in the current
pendamic
Correct your spelling
pandemic
situations.
For instance
, students attend
the
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apply
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online classes using laptops and smartphones. They get their
curriculam
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curriculum
,
cicullar
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circular
, daily activities list on their smartphones only. Even teachers are finding it useful in the
covid
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COVID
-19 situation
,
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apply
show examples
because it makes
e
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it
show examples
asy for them to teach the children without hampering their education. To continue with, on the other side
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,
show examples
it has some demerits
also
.
However
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,
show examples
these devices have benefits but while using
this
students do not get
interst
Correct your spelling
interest
of indulging in outdoor games. They are getting
habitiual
Correct your spelling
habitual
of all these gadgets. After study
Add a comma
,
show examples
they spend most of their
time
on games
instead
of going outside and have some physical activities.
Consequently
, it is affecting their health. By
this
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,
show examples
they may suffer from
h
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a
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ealth issue like obesity which
further
gives birth to
another diseases
Replace the adjective
another disease
other diseases
show examples
. As well as, long
time
facing the screen affects their vision. So it is
neccessery
Correct your spelling
necessary
for the students to participate in outdoor activities as it makes them fit. To conclude,
inspite
Correct your spelling
in spite
of having
n
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a
the
show examples
umber of
advantges
Correct your spelling
advantages
of these devices, children must balance their life
simultanoiusly
Correct your spelling
simultaneously
between outdoor games and gadgets. They must not make themselves dependent on them.
Submitted by shaveta153 on

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