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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that hard work and determination bring success. Others think other factors such as money and good appearance are more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

#people #work #determination #success #factors #money #appearance
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There are certain theories about
success
 in people mind
from
Verify preposition usage
for
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 a long time . Few people believe that continue
s
Add the particle
to
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truggle and focused thinking about goal bring
success
 while some think that wealth and lifestyle are
e
Add an article
an
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ssential part of
success
.
This
 essay will discuss both side of the question and how hard
work
 and determination are more important
then
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than
show examples
 other things. Hard
work
 and focus is key to
success
. It
is often find
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is often found
show examples
 that a person who is willing to pay his 100% attention toward
g
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the
a
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oal and continues
w
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to
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ork on his goal always achieve
success
 in
e
Add an article
the
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nd.Determination and
work
 hard always pay off .
For example
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,
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we have learnt from
teen age
Correct your spelling
teenage
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 in schools if you give your full attention towards your study
then
 you will get
g
Add an article
a
the
show examples
ood score in exam
also
 a student who do top in class his key to
success
 is always continue hours of focused study and determination to achieve top rank in class . So hard
work
 and constant focus become
m
Add an article
a
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ajor factor of
success
. Wealth and personality
shows
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show
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the
Change the article
a
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 brighter part of
p
Add an article
the
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erson. If someone has wealth he
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
don't
 need to do much hard
work
 and it
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
 easy for them to invest money in
d
Add an article
the
a
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ifferent sector without any hesitation and worry.
Also
Add a comma
,
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good
apperance
Correct your spelling
appearance
seem
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seems
show examples
 in
this
 world as
s
Add an article
a
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ign of
success
 .
Mostly
Correct your spelling
Most
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 people see people with luxury car and branded suit
successfull
Correct your spelling
successful
successfully
 and they earn more respect . In conclusion , wealth and luxury lifestyle play
v
Add an article
a
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ital part in
success
 but hard
work
 and continue determination toward
g
Add an article
a
show examples
oal helps to achieve happiness because that struggle comes back to you every time and pays your every single
second
 of
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
.
Submitted by jaswalranjit35 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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