IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Nowadays, international tourism is the biggest industry in the world. Unfortunately, international tourism creates tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#tourism #industry #world #tension #people #cultures
In
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
modern society, many people go abroad for their vacation and
travel
. Because compared to
f
Change the article
a
show examples
ew decades ago, international
tourism
 is not vastly difficult these days.
Thus
, some people say
travel
 to abroad makes tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures. Obvious, there are pros and cons in the increased international
tourism
industry
. But, I believe there are more positive senses. So, I totally disagree with
this
 perspective. In
this
 essay, I will explain the benefits and positive aspect of increase traditional
tourism
industry
.
Firstly
, people who have experienced
travel
to
Verify preposition usage
apply
show examples
abroad are more optimistic. Because they have to experience something new even they do not want. Every
country
 has their own traditional cultures.
For instance
, some countries eat food without spoons or forks. After they get special experienced, most people's perception would be changed to positive sides.
Additionally
, when they find new interesting cultures, they want
Add the particle
to
show examples
learn more about the
country
 include history and the language of the
country
. It will lead to a good relationship between the two countries. On condition that two countries' relationship is good, it
also
 good in their trade
industry
.
This
 means can be the
country
's economic system will be increased because of the good rapport between
t
Add an article
the
show examples
wo countries. In conclusion, there is no doubt
travel
 to abroad is easier than before these days.
Therefore
, there are pros and cons.
However
, In my opinion, increase international
tourism
industry
 has more benefits.
For example
, people make more optimistical.
Moreover
, good relationship consequence of positively experienced in a new
country
 and culture can lead to increase
country
's economic system.
Submitted by paraneunju on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: