In many places, shopping is the leisure time activity for young adults. Why is it so? Do you think it is a negative or a positive development?

#places #leisure #time #activity #adults #development

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is true that nowadays an overwhelming majority of youngsters tend to interact themselves by doing some shopping during spare time. I think that

this

Linking Words

is a negative trend which can cause some inevitable consequences.

To begin

Linking Words

, the main reason for my disagreement is that a number of young people today overuse their rights by spending an enormous amount of money on fashionable items like clothes or accessories.

Subsequently

Linking Words

, their parents have to compromise with huge expenses of their children.

However

Linking Words

some parents are strict when it comes to their offsprings, so in

this

Linking Words

case, the young peoples have rules to follow.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, if the teenagers are out of control, they can simply spend any amount of money to satisfy their own needs and caprices including shopping.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, a great illustration of

this

Linking Words

is that the children, who have been spoiled by their parents, tried to manipulate them in order to obtain as much money as possible for the shopping purposes.

Thus

Linking Words

, it is important that parents monitor their young children and don't surround them with excessive love or caress. Another reason is that

although

Linking Words

the young generation is more likely to habitually shop for interaction. Some of them merely try to superior by wearing stylish clothes and shoes.

Consequently

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

development brings negative elements as other pupils, who may not afford themselves buying luxurious things, feel inferiority among one's friends and relatives. A great number of teenagers, in fact, have a feeble habit to judge by the appearance rather than by personality. It is not surprising that nowadays young people orient to purchase the

last

Linking Words

trends even with nothing to have in its wallets as well.

Therefore

Linking Words

, youth should focus on living without chasing the cutting-edge things, but more value having a firm relationship with their peers. To conclude,

Although

Linking Words

shopping is one of the main aspects of youth's life, I believe that they will deliberately find a productive alternative for

this

Linking Words

activity in the future.

Submitted by Saten on Fri Dec 18 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

327 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
According to an international travel magazine, many tourists today fly straight to their holiday resort and almost never leave it. Unlike tourists in the 1960s and '70s, they return home with no experience of the loacl culture. why do you think this happens ? How was tourism diferent in the past?
Nowadays, many people want to travel with friends and family during holidays or free time . According to a famous travel magazine, many tourists today fly straight to their holiday resort and almost never leave it. Unlike tourists in the 1960s and '70s, they return home with no experience of the loacl culture .
5.5
band
Nowadays there is a tendancy to relocate overseas for lucrative jobs.While a faction of people holds the notion that this movement is challanging (?)for juveniles, others argue that it is better for children.
While a faction of people holds the notion that relocating to overseas for employment purpose is challenging for juveniles, others believe that it is beneficial for children. This essay will delve into both viewpoints and explain my support for the latter view with relevant illustrations.
5
band
TODAY MORE AND MORE PEOPLE WANT THINGS INSTANTLY(E.G : GOODS, SERVICE, NEWS). WHY IS THIS? IS IT POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT?
THE MODERN WORLD IS CHARACTERIZED BY A GROWING DEMAND FOR INSTANT GRATIFICATION. PEOPLE WANT GOODS, SERVICES, AND NEWS AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. IT IS IMPORTANT TO CONSIDER WHETHER THIS IS A POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT.
4
band
An increasing number of children are overweight which could result many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and health care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?
In this contemporary world, it is argued that more and more children have excessive weight. This is achieved by there are lots of food available, especially fast food and sedentary lifestyle. To handle this issue, governments should promote public education and encourage people to move more.
7
band
Many people think it is very important to protect the environment but they make no effort to do it themselves. Why do you think this is the case? What actions should individuals take to protect the environment?
Some people say that it is crucial to save nature but there is no action from them. The primary cause of this problem is that people do not want to protect the environment and the most viable solution is to educate their young people about this issue.

In many places, shopping is the leisure time activity for young adults. Why is it so? Do you think it is a negative or a positive development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

According to an international travel magazine, many tourists today fly straight to their holiday resort and almost never leave it. Unlike tourists in the 1960s and '70s, they return home with no experience of the loacl culture. why do you think this happens ? How was tourism diferent in the past?

Nowadays there is a tendancy to relocate overseas for lucrative jobs.While a faction of people holds the notion that this movement is challanging (?)for juveniles, others argue that it is better for children.

TODAY MORE AND MORE PEOPLE WANT THINGS INSTANTLY(E.G : GOODS, SERVICE, NEWS). WHY IS THIS? IS IT POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT?

An increasing number of children are overweight which could result many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and health care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?

Many people think it is very important to protect the environment but they make no effort to do it themselves. Why do you think this is the case? What actions should individuals take to protect the environment?